Last Note

I am tired of my life,

And now, 

Here I am standing on the roof, ready to dive and regret my life.

Constantly bullied by problems, responsibilities and people.

Constantly bullied by Stress and tension.

Always forced to keep my emotions to myself.

Always told to stop pitying myself.

I am tired of all these shitty things, 

And now,

Here I am standing on the roof, ready to dive and regret my life.

"Depression and loneliness" They giggled hysterically

"It's nothing but trendy words stuck in your head.

It will all get clear just go sleep on your bed."

Quoted my Family and parasitic friends.

I am tired of explaining them again and again.

And now, 

Here I am standing on the roof, ready to dive and regret my life.

All I needed, was someone to stand beside me.

I didn't care if that someone picked me, laughed at me or straight teased me for whimping and falling, I was just desperate for someone to stand for me.

"Why do you say so, I am here.Talk to me." Said my Parents who were always too busy in making a great and bright future for me, never concerning themselves about My opinion on MY Future.

"Talk to me then!" Said my Parasitic friends, who genuinely understood me for an hour and then forgot about it and moved on, leaving me alone and wounded in the dark.

I am tired of finding a genuine person to stand for me and with me,

And now,

Here I am standing on the roof, ready to dive and regret my life.

Just wanted someone to genuinely ask me, "How are you?"

Just wanted someone to genuinely encourage me, "Just hang in there! Never Give Up!"

Just wanted someone to pick up my call when I am giving up on my life.

Just wanted someone to genuinely scream to me that Suicide is never an option.

I am sad that I never got someone like this, I am sad that all I got was some hollow reluctant 'Never Give Up' quotes from my friends.

And now,

Here I am standing on the roof, ready to dive and regret my life.

But I tried my best to convince my mind that Suicide was, is and never will be an option.

I fueled myself with some quotes and baseless confidence.

I fueled myself with genuine gratitude of having such beautiful parents and a false gratitude of having such friends.

But I wasn't able to convince my stupid, whimping heart and that's why 

Here I am standing on the roof, ready to dive and regret my life.