Family - Pedestal of change

Are you that person who suffers from change 

A perfect example entitled to change will always be family where you witness change as a process flowing through at every life stage

Evidently a girl getting married turns into woman then a mother just when you open the gateway to that one person in your life

And as a girl myself I know these changes are good where you constantly get moving ahead with your life

How about seeing yourself on another side of the shore where you are succumbed to sudden changes because of someone's new entry into your family?

A change whether you don't like it or not, you are constantly on the pedestal of change because of someone's priority being changed

To be precise and more relatable, if you are your brother's little sister, does it kind of make you still when your brother being married begins to count the minutes on your clock for spending time with you?

Does it make you feel uncomfortable to talk with your own parents who are pampering your new little brother?

Does that make you automatically zip your mouth when your married sister reasons for being late become her love for her new partner?

All I do is question myself constantly and continuously because it is something beyond looking for answers as the default answer that anyone would tell me is go with the flow of change as if I am not accepting the change that has been voluntarily offered

When I thought family is about encompassing, I am surprised how priorities come into play

When I thought love being an unidimensional state within family, it is yet intersected with ancestor rules and regulations 

When I thought love becomes the center of attraction within family, I am wondered with the reality how people inside the family compete with each other to get that maximum attention and attraction

When I came to the conclusion communication becomes an integral part of the family as there will be no scope of misinterpretation or any post-analysis, I was shaken by the fact how information are misread, tweaked and prone to multiple opinions

When I thought family is all about being there for each other at any circumstances, I regretted later and decided standing on my own and sometimes taking a stand for myself has its merits too

When I thought families see things equally, I forget to bet the reality that equality is more likely dissected under individual perspectives

When I believed families accept your unique personality and let you be who you are, once again I suppose I disregarded the truth of adjustments and compromises

While I was satisfied that my own beloved family saw things through my eyes when the reality hits that they see through their individual perspectives

While I was totally defending the fact of family sticks together with continuous and constant flow of love, I did blindfolded to the realm that family evolves which changes the dimension and intensity of love that was once bestowed upon

For a little I knew, family can never be totally opposites, there exists a guaranteeing amount of like-mindedness after all we are thrown away from the same blood sheds

Unlike the compulsion to deal with the opposites at the outside world, family is a place where one becomes naturally inhabited to cohabit with like-mindedness, at least there will be a certain someone to define your problem as 'ya, me too'

However, the problem becomes more profound when you see yourself to be varying starting from your beliefs and values amidst everyone in your family

t is not an issue on fitting in, sometimes it becomes unruly for me to find lame excuses when I constantly slack off even after trying

As a metaphor, I can relate to this a book which slips off no matter how hard you place them into its array of books in those shelves

So, yes it becomes a hassling everyday when you alone wishes to take the road uphill while the other extensions of your family are already used to take the downhill road

See, I understand the cliche logic that opposites attract do work well especially when it is just between two people, but not always when you are family which inherently means for more than two which relies on mutuality for cohabitation

I do not count for a literal meaning of like-minded to be an agreeing mentality here, it is rather about acknowledging the varying nature of someone for authenticity and uniqueness

Yet, the most unfortunate reality there is more assimilation and digestion of one's differences more than an open acknowledgement

Like, it becomes more of wicked smiles inside their heart serving a sweet spot on their face masks

Like the inequalities in all forms overflows and succumbs the unconditional love and care that was once showered on you

Like it becomes where individual jealousy influences every other members in the vicinity of the whole family and dominates the so far existing altruistic climate of the family

Like they begin to whine about petty things and blow hardly until the balloon bursts on its own

Like it becomes the time for the rise of influencers from your family who are the flag bearers choose a better prospect to join their army just to pull you down as much as possible through the most impossible ways and most of them are the emotional plays

Like they trick you down emotionally and corner you with negativity

Like they become so cold ever even their blood want to discount from their extant shared bonds and still calling it a proud family