A Thin Line

This famous line still halls

Loud and clear in my conscience

Emulating the voice of my mother

"If you can dream it, you can achieve it!"

Tell me something,

Then why when someone dies

In my dream, she says-

"The person's life just increased".

I am not going to lie,

That's a relief mostly.

Except when the dying one is me.

Why can't I achieve my own death?

When I lie down and teleport

To the same old world,

No sense of novelty left

Rewinding the same old sequence-

My grandpa lifting me up

In his arms, 

Us both chucking in pure joy...

I touch his blemished face

With my dwarfed hands

Ending up

Discovering myself as a toddler

Fully aware of holding my grandpa closer...

So much so, I could feel his heartbeats!

I wake up in a thud

To a different sensibility altogether

Like having touched a flower

That once bloomed 

Only now rests in the dust

Of an old book

Like reminiscing over a familiar fragrance

Before it melts into oblivion.

Like a road

Too strange to be walking on

And too familiar to be sidestepping from.

Touching every part of nostalgia...

I realize

Grandpa is long dead and lost in my childhood.

By any chance, can I find them both

From the fragments of my conscience...

Because

How can I feel someone's presence

So Lifelike

And not bring him back?

How can I have a dream

That doesn't cross that line

Of becoming our reality?

Well, I felt his heartbeats!!!