28 Years

Today I grow a year older

With a lot of time behind me

And, perhaps, very few left

I've had many good friends

But lost most to trust

I laughed, I shed my tears

Sometimes alone

At times before people who could bear them

Now I laugh fearfully lest 'they' would see

I want to cry aloud

But fear being called even weaker

Newer people entered my world 

They speak, they smile, they love

But today, I fear to trust 

I stammer to talk

They call me sensible

They call me strong

I smile trying to feel proud

But feel weaker instead

Silently losing to my own facade

The bearers still bear me

Trying to build my lost hopes and dreams

That I am scared to build again

For as I grow older, I care no more

About hope or dope

I now just count the days