The Fight Between Us

Well.... I don't know how to start it but what are most thriller movies based on? Comparison between children and some other physiological effects.right? From my perspective comparison is what I hate the most but my parents don't stop it. Do you people like it? I don't know, you maybe a parent doing it or a child suffering from it.

 I absolutely hate it. That's what in my heart but what my brain says is totally different. Whenever I think something it always opposes me. Why? I have my own reason, don't get me wrong.

Right from my early age I've always been mom's girl. She won't let me play or anything. I would study and watch T.V. Well now that I'm being exposed to this harsh world it hurts a lot. But my mom is sweet till my age of 12. After that?

I'm a loser. I can't make them happy. This what my brain says... let's think a name...''Hana''. 

My heart....''Ai''. Probably it says I worked my best. can't you understand? Isn't 88% a good mark? I don't know if it's a good mark for you but it is for me because I worked day and night for it. From morning 4 to night 10 and those extra burden.But when I think Hana says you've done nothing but I'm killing myself for their happiness. Wait......wait when Ai says that line Hana says isn't their happiness your happiness? They do everything for you. Yes it is right they do everything for me but isn't it going somewhat far. It pains when they say something.

Literally my mom says your friends study hard,what are you doing? 

Your cousin got a good rank, what about you? We are pouring all our hardworking money on you so why won't you study?

•Ai(not actually saying it out) : well.. I've tried my best, why won't you see it. It stings, pains, throbs when you say those words. I've said many a times not to compare me with others. I even admitted that I'm a below average student. Am I really?

I don't think so.

•Hana( not actually saying it out) : Yes, I've done nothing. I can't do anything. I'm pathetic. Yes they are doing everything for me.

•Ai : But why does it pain. When you say something like we've done everything for you. My fragile heart just becomes millions of pieces. Those words are just giving me extra burden.

•Hana : work harder and harder.

•Ai : I can't anymore.

I might be wrong but you people say to follow your heart. right? Then I'll follow it. 

Shorter the shorter, deeper the deeper. Isn't this burden too much for a 14 year old child.

If you are a parent just think before you compare. If you are a child don't let it effect you in a bad way. Parents may oppose my concept of not comparing but ask your child how she\he feels. It's more than enough. Understand them. I don't know neither how you fell nor if you think it's inspirational. But I am suffering.