Shaadi.com

She had barely slept in the night, feeling forlorn she tried to focus her eyes on the wall clock that seemed to be happily ticking the time with precise regularity despite being at work the whole night. It took an uncharacteristically long time for Varsha’s eyes to focus on the two hands of the wall clock, her wobbly brain visualized that it was few minutes past five in the morning. She had no plans to get up at this hour but she also had no happy thoughts to lean upon to pass her time while she lay in bed contemplating her future life. Despite her mind’s reluctance to delve into the painful marital discord which she was experiencing, she found that the same thoughts had again engulfed her. She felt tears flow from her eyes and then, as usual, she had no control on her thought process.

Lying on the bed while the clock ticked, Varsha had no idea when she dozed off. She entered the REM phase of her sleep and started dreaming. Her mind took her two decades back, she was a bride and Sudesh stood smiling in front of her. Someone had handed a floral garland in her hand and she was poised to put this garland on the neck of Sudesh. Dreams don’t give you the luxury of time gap, they come and go in broken segments. The next segment of the dream was a recollection of the memory when her daughter Sunanda was born. Even in dream she felt the harsh reality of the intense labour pain. Her stochastic thought process catapulted her to a recent memory. She went past the memory of a Sunday afternoon when she had on an impulse opened Sudesh’s mobile phone and had discovered a flurry of lewd messages from a female colleague. This was such a hostile memory that made Varsha jolt even in sleep. She woke from the dream sequence. Varsha found that she was experiencing palpitations. A full minute passed before she came to senses. She looked at the clock. The clock showed thirty minutes past nine. Varsha rubbed her puffy eyes and went to the washroom.

Varsha heard some clutter in the kitchen and realized that Sudesh was already half ready to go to office. A far voice in her mind reminded her that she had last spoken with Sudesh almost four months back. The subsequent events had been fast. She vividly remembered that Saturday evening when Sudesh in a fit of rage had acknowledged that he was indeed in relationship with a colleague and would shortly start the proceedings of divorce.

While Varsha was emotionally torn, her fifteen-year daughter, Sunanda, silently witnessed the pain of her parents. At fifteen years she was fully aware of the trauma her mother was experiencing. Varsha did her best to isolate Sunanda from what was happening in the house but her efforts were not enough to insulate her daughter from experiencing the tense atmosphere of home.

The bitter environment of the impending divorce lasted for the next couple of months. Varsha went through some of the most heart wrenching emotional moments while lawyers thrashed out the terms of the divorce.

Life post-divorce was not easy but not that bad also. Varsha devoted her time and energy in grooming Sunanda and facilitating her higher studies. Time flew fast, Sunanda completed her  Ph D and soon got a post doc position at Ohio State University, USA. Varsha retired from her teaching job and lived alone in her house. Her daily routine revolved around the ten-minute whatsapp call every morning when Sunanda would call her from US. At times when Varsha would gauge that her daughter was in a happy mood, she would test her with the question of marriage. Sunanda would invariably try to skip this question or change the topic.

With monetary support from Sunanda and her own pension forthcoming, Varsha felt much ease in life. She had now moved far from the days when cultural constraints imposed many restrictions on a divorced woman. She had a reliable friend circle and every Saturday she gleefully went for the kitty party. When elderly women meet in a group, a common gossip revolves around marriage of their children. In between the gossip sessions, a friend suggested Varsha to put a matrimony advertisement for Sunanda on one of the trending online platforms, such as Shaadi.com. When Varsha confided that Sunanda doesn’t reply to her query for marriage proposal, someone suggested that Varsha must try to find a boy who also lives in the US. This suggestion looked plausible to Varsha.

It took another two weeks for Varsha to apply her mind into drafting a matrimonial advertisement for Sunanda and then register with Shaadi.com. paying the fee of Rs 14000 for the platinum registration, she checked the portal for the advertisement. Varsha felt so happy while she went through the advertisement.  A thin film of tear coated her eyes. With eyes open and fixated on an abstract object, Varsha’s mind conjured an image of Sunanda in bridal attire. Varsha experienced a bout of oxytocin. In the next few minutes, her mind took her back in time, she reminisced the whole journey of Sunanda from her first day in school to the moment when she saw her off at the IGI airport. Varsha copied the link of the matrimonial advertisement and pasted on Sunanda’s whatsapp. She pressed the send button.

While Varsha was happy that she had taken a bold step of uploading the matrimony advertisement for Sunanda, another story was unfolding some thirteen thousand kilometers away in Miami, USA. Sunanda and her boyfriend Mike had started their vacation and had checked around noon in the Extended Stay America Hotel in Miami. They had booked a cab for the South beach. The serenity of the South Beach in Miami was mesmerizing.  The sound of the waves created a constant murmur which was extremely soothing to the human ear. As far back as recorded history, humans have found the vast span of the blue colour of water relaxing to their mind. Science has now confirmed the calming effect of the blue ocean on the human mind which is characterized by a measurable reduction in cortisol, the body’s primary stress hormone. Sunanda felt a sensation beyond description when she touched the water of the Atlantic Ocean on the vast span of South beach. Some forty yards behind Mike lay lazily on the sand wearing a jockey printed Bermuda. He pointed his DSLR camera towards Sunanda. In the red halter neck two-piece bikini, Sunanda was  looking gorgeous. While Sunanda played aimlessly with the rhythmic waves, some forty yards away Mike followed her with his zoom lens on DSLR. He adored the tanned skin and the curvy figure of Sunanda.

It was in the evening when Sunanda returned to her hotel room that she checked her phone. There was a message from her mother with a hyperlink inserted. Sunanda opened the hyperlink and broke into a sweat, as she scrolled down the matrimonial profile of herself, her mind went into a tizzy. She silently blurted out a few choicest profanities cursing her destiny. Fortunately, Mike had gone out. Without calculating the time difference Sunanda dialed her mother.

It was six in the morning when Varsha got a call from Sunanda. This was an odd time. For the next fifteen minutes a debate ensued between Sunanda and her mother. In between this conversation, Varsha started weeping. Sunanda too felt the pain of her doting mother. To make her mother happy, Sunanda chose to lose the debate but deep inside her brain she was thinking about the escape routes she could invent so that the matrimony does not culminate. Even after hanging the call, Sunanda’s mind was preoccupied with the debate she just had with her mother so much so that she had no idea when Mike came in the room. Mike hugged her from behind and caressed her. Sunanda did not protest. Mike lifted Sunanda in his arm and went to the bed.

Sunanda lived through the Miami vacation but her mind was always preoccupied with the thought of how she would tell her mother that she was in a live-in relationship and that the matrimonial advertisement was inherently redundant. In saner mood, Sunanda did realize that her mother’s insistence for marriage was true by Indian standards. She also realized that her mother had gone through so much turmoil in life and that now her only joy in life was perhaps the wellbeing of Sunanda. Thus, with no ill feelings, Sunanda decided that she would not be rude to her mother but would find a way to decline any marriage proposal that emanates through this advertisement.

Checking the portal of Shaadi.com for any possible responses suddenly became a joyful passion for Varsha. Whenever she got time, she logged into the portal and checked. A week passed and Varsha became less enthusiastic. It was on a Sunday afternoon that Varsha suddenly found a response against Sunanda’s profile. Somebody by the name of Sanjay Pandey had responded. Going inside the reply it was apparent that Sanjay Pandey was the father of the boy. Accompanying the response was a brief biodata of the boy. It was mentioned that the boy had graduated from IIT, Kanpur and was presently working in a reputed software company in New Jersey, USA. There was a long shot of the boy which gave the impression that he was tall and could be classified as handsome.

Varsha’s joy knew no bounds. She viewed the photograph of the boy from different angles and evaluated how Sunanda would respond looking at this photograph. Within minutes she forwarded the message and the photograph to Sunanda.

Sunanda felt annoyed at the speed with which her mother was proceeding. She contemplated sending a rude reply but then resisted the urge. She could visualize her mother and relate to her happiness. Sunanda didn’t reply to the message.

Varsha responded to the message of Sanjay Pandey and sent a few recent pics of Sunanda. In a text message she gave a brief family history of herself mentioning that she is the mother of the girl, she also mentioned that her husband was not alive. Writing this line did give a mental distress to Varsha but she found it better to speak a lie than to confess that her husband had divorced her.

Sanjay Pandey was a man in his sixties, sixty-three to be precise, and lived an affluent life in New Delhi.  Other than the three petrol pumps that he owned, he had a fleet of cars which he used as rental cabs. Sanjay Pandey’s only unfinished agenda in life was the marriage of his son Ashok. Since the time he lost his wife during COVID, Sanjay felt lonely and wanted his son to come back to India and settle here. In Sanjay’s definition, marriage was the culmination of ‘settlement’ in life. It was a Friday evening when Sanjay received Varsha’s response. He felt happy to receive a reply. The girl whose photo was attached looked charming. Sanjay’s mind visualized Ashok with Sunanda. He felt happy.

The next day, the Saturday morning, Sanjay drafted a long email to his son Ashok. Starting from his wife’s death, Sanjay deftly played an emotional card. He mentioned that life is uncertain and he too was getting old and therefore wanted Ashok to come back to India and settle taking care of the family’s business. After a preamble, Sanjay Pandey mentioned his recent conversation with a family which was seeking a matrimonial proposal for her daughter who also lived in US. Sanjay used a lot of touching conversation in an effort to coax Ashok to give an effective consideration to this marriage proposal.

American Airlines flight AA696 from Chicago landed at the JFK airport New York at 7.30 pm. Ashok waited at the arrival gate with flowers. Sandra had no checked baggage and therefore was among the first passengers to exit the airport. She spotted Ashok and ran towards him. Ashok too took a few strides but Sandra caught him wrong footed. The embrace was passionate but clumsy. These scenes were common at JFK and no one observed how an Indian man hugged a svelte beauty for a full sixty seconds.

A night before Ashok had already booked the Cachet Boutique Hotel at the 42nd street, just a kilometer away from Times Square. Since Sandra was carrying just a small bag, Ashok suggested that they spend some time at the Times Square. Despite the fact that it was nine in the night, the evening had just started at the Times Square. Ashok found a spot on the stairs and they both sat there. One thing that Ashok had always noticed in US was that no one ever looked at you or noticed what you were doing. This was so different from his country of origin. Ashok held Sandra as close to him as possible. At intervals he kissed her without any overt reason. On her part Sandra melted in his embrace. Ashok realized he was meeting Sandra after two weeks.

It was at around half past midnight, while a drained and exhausted Ashok lay holding Sandra in his arms, that he heard a notification on his phone. Ashok glanced at the screen and realized there was a whatsapp message from his father. Taking care that the phone was not visible to Sandra, he opened the message. Ashok’s bout of dopamine and oxytocin, that he was experiencing during this love making interlude, suddenly ebbed. His stress hormones engulfed his body. This was the last thing Ashok wanted to hear from his father. Marriage in the traditional Indian way and that too an arranged one was too farfetched. Ashok had been for the last couple of months seriously contemplating of proposing to Sandra.

While Sandra slept, gleefully resting her head on Ashok’s arm, Ashok pretended but didn’t actually sleep. His mind searched for excuses that he would write to his father so that he gets over the idea of marriage and simultaneously doesn’t feel emotionally hurt.

Sanjay read the reply of his son. Ashok had written that presently he was too busy with work assignments but would certainly consider the marriage proposal when he gets time. Sanjay felt happy that Ashok had been profuse in showing respect and emotion to his father. In his heart Sanjay was confident that his son would comply with his wishes. Sanjay read his son’s message several times and each time that he read he became more and more convinced that Ashok was agreeable to the proposal. A thin smile appeared on Sanjay’s face when his mind played back to him the thought that his son was not that extrovert to say a forthcoming ‘yes’ to his father in matters concerning marriage. Sanjay continued to chew his son’s message the whole day and by evening his mind had become confident in acknowledging that Ashok’s message was a silent approval of the proposal.

It was just after the evening tea that Sanjay Pandey picked up his mobile phone and dialed Varsha. The phone was answered on the second ring; Varsha’s heart beat a little faster seeing a call from Mr Sanjay Pandey and she blurted a meek ‘hello’ taking full care that her excitement rest confined to herself. Sanjay Pandey’s heart also came under the influence of his adrenaline, ostensibly for no apparent reason. Sanjay realized that he was much beyond the age for any apprehensive feelings but much to his own astonishment he felt a strange feeling talking to Varsha. The conversation that started on an official pretext extended for a good sixteen minutes and ended with both Varsha and Sanjay Pandey agreeing that they would encourage Sunanda and Ashok to talk to each other on telephone.

Varsha was quick to write a long message to Sunanda extolling the virtues of the boy with whom she had proposed her marriage. In this message Varsha gave a detailed account of the boy’s family mentioning in bold Ashok’s mobile number. Varsha ended her message with a note that Sunanda must find an opportune time to call Ashok. In more or less similar way, although slightly less emphatically, Sanjay Pandey also drafted a message to his son Ashok making a case that he must call Sunanda and judge her independently.

Both Ashok and Sunanda, oblivious of each other, received messages from their respective father and mother which created trauma in their lives. Over the last two years while Ashok had been dating Sandra, his life had become so purposeful. Sandra had brought so much joy to him and had played the part of a keel in stabilizing his life’s boat. For Ashok it was now impossible to consider someone else as a life partner. Sunanda felt the same for Mike. For the last eighteen months, Sunanda had moved to his apartment in Columbus, near the Ohio State University campus and only by US standards their status was a live-in relationship. By Indian yardstick both Sunanda and Mike were living their life as a married couple.

In the next two months that followed, Sanjay Pandey and Varsha kept sending messages to their son and daughter sometimes encouraging and sometimes coercing them to talk to each other. The reply which came back from both Sunanda and Ashok never mentioned a full-blown denial but every time there was a plausible but a lame excuse. After the third month, it was Varsha who got impatient. In one of the messages to her daughter, acting on the advice of her kitty party friends, she sent a harsh message to Sunanda giving her a veiled ultimatum to talk to Ashok.

Sunanda had never seen her mother so angry. She felt clueless what to do next. The first thing that she did was to reply to her mother telling her that she will call Ashok in the next few days. This reply to her mother was primarily dictated by the fact that she knew too well that for her mother she was the only silver lining and her mother’s life now revolved around her.

It was the Saturday evening when Sunanda mustered the courage and called Ashok. Sunanda introduced herself and approached the topic. Very hesitantly she mentioned that her mother had given this phone number and that probably there was a proposal for marriage between their parents. Ashok felt strange in talking to Sunanda. Only yesterday he had bid goodbye to Sandra. Ashok could feel that Sunanda was too subdued in talking to him. There was something in her mind which was apparently not visible. After a short conversation, Ashok took initiative and posed a very blunt question to Sunanda. He asked her whether she was interested in marriage. Sunanda felt a sigh of relief, even before her brain could decipher the question, she spontaneously said ‘no’.

The answer from Sunanda broke the ice between the two. Ashok confided to Sunanda that he also did not want to marry because he was in a steady relationship. Thus, what started as a short mobile call only to fulfil an undertaking given to a parent extended for almost thirty minutes. Both understood that the other person was not interested in this marriage proposal. Once both Ashok and Sunanda agreed on their status, it was easy to decide that both will not be rude to their parents and would go slow in their effort to prolong the process and slowly tell them that they will not marry.

Sunanda felt happy at the outcome, with the Damocles sword of marriage not hanging on her head, she felt quite light at heart. She called her mother and told her that she had spoken to Ashok and that they would be in touch and talk further. Varsha felt happy, silently she prayed and took a pledge to visit the Hanuman temple for obeisance the next Tuesday. Sanjay Pandey received his son’s message almost mirroring what Sunanda had written to her mother. Sanjay too felt happy. In this moment of happiness, he decided to disregard the doctor’s advice, he made a whiskey peg. Putting a few ice cubes, he again read Ashok’s message and silently savored the moment sitting on his rocking chair.

Both Sunanda and Ashok received affirmative and happy messages from their parents.  Ashok felt relieved that his father Sanjay Pandey was in a good mood. Recollecting the events of the last two days, Ashok felt amused. He knew that Sunanda had played a big role by telling her personal decision to Ashok. Ashok knew that at least the urgency of his father had been taken care of for the present.

Still unsteady with the events of the last two days, Ashok didn’t realize why he picked up the phone and called Sunanda. Sunanda had just returned to her quarter from the University and was also in a good mood after reading her mother’s reply. She was startled to see Ashok’s call. Gingerly she replied. Ashok told Sunanda that he appreciated Sunanda’s frank admission of not being interested in marriage. This time Sunanda was frank and confident. She took the liberty of joking with Ashok about how the older generation feels about arranged marriage. In the ensuing conversation they both decided that although there was no chance of marriage but they would be telling their parents that they are talking to each other and would take a decision on marriage once they both agree.

In their respective lives, both Sanjay Pandey and Varsha got a new lease of positive energy. Varsha was more excited. She even started writing the names of invitees for the marriage ceremony. Sanjay Pandey’s excitement was more subtle although palpable. In recent days he observed that his knee was giving him less pain, he could sense the feeling of joy in his daily routine. His telephonic conversations with Ashok became much more engaging.

It was a Friday evening, with the positive acknowledgement from her daughter of having talked with Ashok, Varsha found it easy to call Sanjay Pandey. Sanjay Pandey also felt easy to talk to Varsha. This time the conversation meandered from pleasantries to trivial. Varsha observed that Sanjay Pandey had a good sense of humour. In between the conversation, on occasions, Varsha laughed rather unabashedly. As a parting note, Varsha asked Sanjay whether she can make a video call when she called next time.

A week passed and both Sanjay and Varsha’s mind juggled happy thoughts of the possible marriage of their son and daughter. In a different setting, almost thirteen thousand kilometers away, Ashok and Sunanda felt relaxed that at least for now their parents were happy with the illusion of their impending marriage. With two phone calls behind them and a shared camouflage, both Sunanda and Ashok started exchanging calls, once in a while, just to catch up with developments at their respective homes in India. 

Varsha’s video call elicited a prompt response from Sanjay Pandey. He picked the call with an excitement as if subconsciously he was looking forward to it. Before making the call, Varsha had made effort to use makeup on her face. She looked at the mirror and self-complimented her on her looks. Ashok found Varsha much younger than her biological age which he could guess from the fact that she had retired from Government service. The conversation was lively; Sanjay Pandey was impressed by Varsha’s eloquence. Varsha deftly made the conversation lighter probing Sanjay with intelligent questions. She asked Sanjay as to which team he supported in the IPL. At the end of the twenty-two minutes video call, Sanjay felt more at ease than before, He realized Varsha’s demeanor was indeed a temptation in disguise.

Time flew, both Sanjay and Varsha were constantly being fed cooked information by Sunanda and Ashok. Since there was no cause to disbelieve what their children told them, both Sanjay and Varsha continued to wait for the time when they would hear from their children that they had agreed for marriage. Thus, while Ashok and Sunanda were in their own happy domains, one with a steady girlfriend and the other in live-in relationship, their parents were living in fool’s paradise.

With a happy thought to ponder, Varsha spent hours thinking about Sunanda’s marriage. Simultaneous to this lingering thought her mind also sometimes conjured the image of Sanjay Pandey. Every time such thought cropped up in Varsha’s mind she would sense a feeble dose of adrenalin in her system.

In another city Sanjay Pandey too was recollecting the past events on a Sunday afternoon and his mind flashed the memory of his last video call with Varsha. He recollected that Varsha was an interesting woman. Thus, without any obvious intent, Sanjay picked up his phone and called Varsha. An excited voice greeted him. Since there was nothing new to report from Ashok and Sunanda, this time the conversation between Sanjay and Varsha was more personal. Varsha spoke to Sanjay in an affable tone. She showed genuine concern when Sanjay told her that he was not well for the last couple of days. On his part, Sanjay felt a calming effect being in conversation with Varsha.

In the next couple of weeks, the telephonic conversation between Sanjay and Varsha became a daily affair. Varsha found solace when she would pour her daily worries to Sanjay. On his part Sanjay loved the insipid daily banter of Varsha.

A month passed, Sanjay and Varsha’s phone calls had now become religiously regular. The pretext of marriage between Ashok and Sunanda became a thing of the past. Varsha would seek advice from Sanjay for all sundry chores.

In one of the conversations Varsha told Sanjay that for attending a function she was coming to Delhi. Sanjay excitedly offered her his place for any number of days she may wish to stay. Sanjay received Varsha at the airport and drove her to his house. Varsha felt a strange sense of protection in company of Sanjay.

In the evening Sanjay took Varsha out for dinner. The restaurant was classy with a live band. Tonight, the lead vocalist was singing old Bollywood classics. Sanjay had made the order but a clumsy silence had descended on Varsha. The band was playing the song ‘agar mujhse Mohabbat hai, mujhe sab apne gham de do’ . Sanjay looked towards Varsha, he could clearly see that there were emotional tears in her eyes. The tears wanted to convey some emotion. Sanjay extended his hand and held Varsha’s hand. A few tears fell on Sanjay’s hand. Life had taken a new turn.

In the next couple of days Sanjay and Varsha did brainstorming to find a way to inform Ashok and Sunanda. They both decided that they must inform their children as soon as possible lest they finalize anything. A plan was made.

Ashok received a long message from Sanjay mentioning that of late he has received many other offers from girl parents for Ashok’s marriage and therefore now he was not enthusiastic about the matrimonial proposal from Sunanda. Even while Ashok was reading this message, he received a call from Sunanda, in an excited tone Sunanda told Ashok that her mother had called her just now and conveyed some reservations regarding Ashok.

Ashok and Sunanda did not understand this sudden change of heart of their parents but didn’t probe it further since both were happy with the developments.

The marriage was a very private affair. Only a few kitty party friends were invited from Varsha’s side. Ashok and Sunanda joined online. Varsha finally moved in Sanjay’s lavish house in Delhi. Varsha was amused when she saw the large framed poster with Shaadi.com in large golden font adorning the wall of the bedroom.