Praying For A Answer

There are times in our lives when we feel lost when we are tired. When we have tried and tried and yet nothing is happening.

There are times when we have been knocked down so many times that we feel like giving up. So much so that we think it's not even worth it. Just forget about it. The dream is never going to happen. Just let it go.

I know these feelings because a few years ago, that was me. I've done all the right "things." I went to church twice a week, I tithe, I help people and try to be a blessing to others. I trusted God, I have faith, and I know he knows my heart, and what I truly want to do.

So I did the only thing I know how to do when I get to this point is I pray. It seems like every year during the time of our International believers conference, I pray for a message, something I need to hear and trust, and believe, I always get it. That year was no different, and the message was just what I needed.

If you follow me, you know I am a single mom with 2 girls in college, you know I am a hustler and I work 3 jobs. I own a professional organizing and personal assistant business, I do hair on the side, and I take odd jobs like surveys and focus groups to pay the bills.

I've been praying why I am here. This is not my purpose or my passion. God... you know I want to write, I want to speak to tell others about what you did for me, to help others hold on, to move past their hurts like I have.

Why God? Why am I still here? This is what I've been asking. I was so discouraged, I knew what I wanted to do and this wasn't it.

Td Jakes's message at our conference was and I quote.

"God hears your cries. He knows this is not where you want to be. He hears you asking why am I still here. He feels your pain, and he knows that this isn't your purpose. "

Okay, I can't make this shit up even if I tried.

He goes on to say "I put you there for a reason, I will let you know when you are ready to move, you just have to hold on, to have faith, I know it's hard but just hold on, because it's coming. Don't give up. "

Well, I went into the ugly cry. This was God speaking through him to me for sure.

This is exactly what I was thinking, what I was praying about, and here he is speaking it all.

See, I believe in messages from God, like when you're praying and you turn on a song on the radio that says what you are feeling. When you find a book or scripture that validates your ideas. When you see a meme that is telling you what you need to hear, all of these are messages from God.

You must listen. You must trust the process.

I don't know why I am there, I am not sure about the lessons I am learning, maybe it's to humble myself, maybe it's to see people who lived lives and have the wisdom to teach me. Maybe it's not ready. Maybe I'm not ready as much as I think I am. The reason is not clear yet, but I am grateful for what I have. I am happy I am working my own business and doing things my way. I know it will come just as I knew for the 4 last years while I was in that verbally abusive marriage that I would be where I am today. I knew it, I envisioned it. I believe even as I sat in the bathtub night after night crying I wish I could be out of there. It was on his time, not mine, just like this time.

So today, my friends, I am here as a living testimony to tell you that if you pray for an answer, he will give it to you.

If you believe and never give up, you will get what you want and sometimes even more than what you asked for. You can't give up. Keep praying for the answers.