The Untimely Apology

I go to sleep at 11 PM every night 

Locking all the doors, leaving open the windows 

With the hope that my soft bedroom light 

Invites at midnight a few wandering souls

And in the morning a few meandering sparrows... 

Before I go to sleep every night 

I sit before your portrait and offer my apologies 

Some times I say it, some times I write 

But I ensure that it is done patiently and right..

I wish this patience had shown up that morning 

When you and I had that monstrous fight 

Mom tried to stop us, and dear sister was pleading 

You were ready to back off but I was brimming with anger and spite... 

"I wish I didn't have a dad like you," I shouted

Not knowing that the universe was listening 

You returned to us that night in a coffin, shrouded

Leaving behind an unsolvable puzzle 

Who had killed you - the reckless lorry driver or your reckless son?

Whenever my friends tell me of a fight at home 

I beg them to call and ask 'sorry' 

Only if I had gained earlier this wisdom 

Our house would still be open to merry 

And I would have kept at bay a lifelong misery...