If I Could

If I could ever bare my soul to you, you'd see the scars that run across my back.

The telltale signs of my lovers, the marks of their burning cigarettes.

If I could ever rest my head on your lap, you'd feel my body shudder at your touch.

I'm memories of hands that were tender at first, commanding later and sadistic by the end.

If I could ever talk my heart out to you, you'd hear my voice shake at places.

Mnemonic to the words that cut through my heart and shatter my pride.

If I'd ever let you hold me close, you'd know how hard it breaks my walls.

For my nightmares take over my cravings to be loved.