Astray Thoughts

Death how great thou would be,

Fear of heights, yet I would jump off the highest building with glee,

Anything I can do to succumb into you,

Please just take me this time, I wish to bid this misery..., Adieu.

Acting to be happy is my forte, strenuous to hide my fears...

From happy faces around me with hopeful eyes and wiped tears,

It seems such a perfect home with all smiles and no cry,

Haunting truth is no more a secret to them and to me,

Yet it is best to deny.

Bored of my long-lasting affairs with Ms. Pain,

The countless Chemoes, Radiation, and Surgeries have finally lost their battle in vain,

Miracles have started to giggle when my loved ones pray,

All think I am naive when they say "Don't worry there is surely another way".

My agonising situation have got my thoughts astray I agree,

As these are not the musings I desired mine to be,

Life isn't about giving-up in not finding an oasis,

It's about unwrapping each day good or worse with the same curiosity,

Hence I ought to force my depressing thoughts to take a backseat,

And stay optimistically determined to not take any defeat.