Anxiety

That feeling of fear gushing inside of you

At the slightest change in your life

Choking your throat on the way,

Making your chest heavy

Blocking your airway

Tears just waiting to rush down your eyes

Unexplainable but yet making so much sense

Threads tangled in your brain

Faint yet so loud voice

As if something inside of you guides you to be like this

This is the moment,

You can't calm down

You can't be comforted

Not by anything, not by anyone

Because think about it, who'd even pay attention?

To such a petty thing making you nervous

And there's 'you think a lot' waiting to come out of each one of them

It's difficult to recognise this voice

It's yours but yet it's so not,

Overpowering every other one

The inability to stop,

When each part of your body shouts 

This is wrong, this will make it worse

Yet you refuse to hear them

You refuse to be alright

As if someone else has taken control

You question every situation in your life

Trying to understand,

Why haven't I lost control on this one?

This is supposed to be way more scary

Than the one, which wrecked me last time

I am not supposed to be okay

Being sane, becomes unusual for you

Was I just pretending then?

It was a one day thing probably,

You assure yourself

Just a usual day

And there it is

Again.

And again.

Trigger, the fancy word, they say

Figure it out

But can you ever?