The Apology

I really don't know what's it like being sober

Cause I hurt her.

I really don't know if I can be noble,

But I just wanna hold you.

It hurts to the core Knowing that this is goodbye.

I wonder if you hurt too.

I'm sick and tired of all the lies.

I don't know where to begin.

See I did a couple of things.

I'm not proud of.

A bunch of sins.

Whether I sink or swim.

The war with myself I swear I'll never win.

I let my devilish sensations take over.

I let myself go with them.

I regret it.

I wish I could forget it,

But instead, I'm stuck beating myself up about it.

I lost everything I ever wanted.

I swear I meant every word.

I still want to give you the world.

I told myself you'd be better without me

And maybe it's true.

I told myself I wasn't in love with you

And that was a lie too.

I forced myself to move on.

Deep down all I really want is you.

I tried to remind myself of the damage you gave.

When I shouldn't have because I forgave.

I let everything bad rise to the surface.

I'm spilling all this blood on the pages...

It wasn't really worth it.

I never meant to hurt you.

Even though I said it, but baby you don't get it. 

I thought we were perfect.

I was just too afraid, to tell the truth.

I just knew that it would hurt too...

I'd go the extra miles to get to you.

I know it's a little too late,

But I'm hurting inside because of the way I left you

And maybe it wasn't fate.

No matter how much you push me away

I can't be mad at you cause you showed me how to be great.

I hope that I get to see how you will blossom

Because of you, I'm sprouting.

Learning more of how to love me altogether.

Even when some days are worst I keep trying,

But the pain is forever.

I could go on and on about how much I'm hurting,

But the main point is that I get my message across.

If you really want her, let her know.

Live in the moment.

Forget about the past.

Don't worry about the future.

Cause honestly shit never last.