To the most beloved person in my life...

My Dear Mom,

            Am thinking what to write………..I have a lot to tell you… but am confused that from where I start or what all I need to share…… One thing I am sure about is whatever I tell even if it seems a “nothing” to others will be something for you. I really miss you Amma..Very badly… Now am feeling a long distance between us, of course not mentally. You don’t know how much dependent I was on you. See now your daughter is independent, but struggling to find happiness. I really can’t remember my toddler stage things, but now I can feel the efforts, love, care and all the emotions you have gone through in that period. Yes, Now am also a mother. I am wondering how patient you were, how caring you were… Amma… I wish I could be at my home only as your daughter forever… At the time of my marriage I never thought of your feelings. To be frank, I was selfish… You could have missed me a lot… you always wanted me to be happy.

The freedom and trust you gave was really amazing. You never told me to do household, works in the label of a “girl” or a “woman”. At that time I never valued those things since I was not aware of the whole society. But now I realize on what all a woman has to pass through. The discrimination between boys and girls actually begins from the childhood itself and it goes on…. there is no end .I feel like I am so lucky that I have never gone through such discrimination till my marriage. But now I understand the frustrations and sorrows of each woman who are facing this discrimination in their home itself. Am not kidding, it starts from the food we get. Priority always goes to the men. I don’t know why these things are happening and why there is no end to it??? I am grateful to you Amma that you have never shown that kind of discriminations…

As a teacher, you were loved by so many of your students. Even though I studied in the same school, you never entered as a teacher in my classes in my school life. But you are the best real teacher in my life. You never told to score this much or to join this course. I want to tell you that I am so grateful to you for all the freedom you gave me to choose my career,friends and even my life partner..Now I realize that the trust you had on me was really great and still you have the same. You never wanted to see your girl at a hi-fi level instead you always want me to see as a happy and satisfied person. After becoming a mother, now I realize how much affectionate I was towards you and I still wish to be pampered by you. Do you know what is the most important thing that you have done for me.. ?? You allowed me to live as the “real me”.Yes, that was the most precious thing you have given and am so thankful to you dear for the freedom you gave me to live as myself as an open book…I lost that transparency of my life today..

Life has changed a lot…My viewpoints have changed…My lifestyle has changed…The only thing which hasn’t changed is the love towards you. Words are not enough to express my love towards you my dear Amma… You are the most beloved and greatest person I have ever met in my life and am feeling so lucky that I came to this beautiful world as your daughter. I love you Amma…Love you so much…