Shivoham

Shivoham

8 mins
767


Suyash was engrossed in his thoughts, sitting in front of his laptop, with his eyes closed.

Then his wife Vishakha said."Eat your food first and do your writing later."

"Not now .... Naved Khan needs me now."

"Well then. Please help your Naved Khan. My favorite movie is about to start on TV. Now food will be available only after the movie is over."

"Okay .... You go and enjoy your movie." Suyash said with eyes closed."


Vishakha said while moving out, "Suyash, if you had created a female character in place of Naved Khan, I could have said that she was my sister being your second wife."


Suyash got back his smile on his face. After Vishakha left, he started reading on the laptop screen.

When Naved's eyes opened, there was only darkness around him. After a few moments, when his eyes got used to it, he saw blurred shapes in that darkness. There were cardboard boxes all around. Perhaps there was a warehouse. Along with the eyes, his other senses also started working. There was an unpleasant smell. Is there any toilet here? Naved tried to move. He realized that his leg was missing. Who has removed his prosthetic leg? And why has it been removed? The person who had kidnapped him was so scared. He was scared that he might run away. Naved Khan laughed. Perhaps, for this reason, his prosthetic leg had been removed.


Naved Khan was confined to that place. Until Suyash takes him out of there, he will feel restless.

How can he feel comfortable? Naved Khan is not a different person than him. He is only a shadow of Suyash. Naved Khan is born out of churning by the struggling mind of Suyash.


The car accident of that night had taken away everything from him. He was bedridden as he was incapacitated. He could not move at his free will. He felt sad seeing the face of Vishakha. She smiled in front of him. But he knew how sad she was from inside. His family members were upset. Nobody used to say anything but he could see the moist eyes of everyone peeping out of their false smile. His career as a cricketer was doomed as he was lying on the bed like a living corpse.

Despair-Filled darkness seized his entire personality. He used to scream silently lying in bed.


“I do not want to live. Why did you keep me alive? Just take it away now”.

Hiding his feelings to himself, he too had learned to cry in front of that invisible and ultimate power.

Due to the efforts of doctors and the blessings of the family, he came to a wheelchair from the bed. But the desire to live was not found in him.

In such a situation, he became irritable. He used to get annoyed at everything. In particular, the unsolicited consolation of people irritated him most in which he found less of encouragement and more of pity for his helplessness.


His irritable nature had the most effect on Vishakha. He used to shout at her unnecessarily.

Why do you come to pity me like others? I do not need anybody. Not even you. I shall drag myself to death in confinement, sliding with this wheelchair.

It was not that he did not realize Vishakha's anxieties. But he was worried that Vishakha had to face all miseries due to him.


But Vishakha was like a rock. Every moment she thought of getting Suyash out of his despair.

Suyash, whose hand she had held to walk the path of life, was very combative even when he was in a difficult phase of his cricketing career. He was going through a lean patch of his cricketing career. He had scored just 70 runs in the last ten innings. In the last three innings, he was out for zero consistently. There were adverse comments in newspapers. “Hat-trick by Suyash”.


Both had taken seven rounds in a very simple ceremony during those difficult times. But on the very first night, Suyash said,” I will not give room for the people to say that you are the wife of a flop cricketer. I shall bounce back.”

After that Suyash made a gallant comeback. His words kept echoing in Vishaka's ears. She wanted Suyash to say again, “I shall bounce back.”

But this time Suyash had lost that spirit. However, Vishakha could become stronger.


When someone tries to find a way, even the darkness fails. Vishakha’s efforts too brought colors.

Vishakha met a very remarkable genius at the home of her friend, Aditya. Arihant was a retired German-language professor by profession. But he had a special interest in Indian philosophy and texts. He used to go abroad to speak on Indian religions and philosophy. In this connection, he had come to Aditya’s house. The same evening, his lecture was organized by a well-known institution in the city. Vishakha, impressed by his talk, had decided that she would take Suyash to that lecture.


It was difficult but she convinced Suyash. The auditorium was full. But Arihant had made a special arrangement for them.

Arihant started his lecture.


“Shivoham , that is, I am Shiva. So who is this Shiva? Shiva is the basis of this creation. The origin is from Shiva. The end also is in Shiva itself. So I am that Shiva myself. Then where is the need for me to seek power from outside?”Arihant questioned and then looked at the auditorium full of audience.


“Why should I beg before any other power to get anything. I am the ultimate power. Why not I try to get myself what I want. I am responsible for my failures. My success depends on me”.

Arihant stopped again. Everyone was silently listening to the lecture.

“Shivohan” .... “Aham Brahmasmi”.... These are the pronouncement of our ancestors. These are not mere words but the source of power”.


The auditorium was buzzing with applause. Vishakha was also clapping. But Suyash was still sitting in a depressed mood. He was fretting over Vishakha. Why has she brought me to this useless lecture? All these are meaningless talk. There is a difference between saying and doing. One may understand only when one passes through hardships.


After the lecture, Vishakha met Arihant with Suyash. Arihant was wearing a saffron-colored kurta. There was a lungi of the same color below, which was worn in the South Indian style. Arihant welcomed them heartily.

"How are you, Suyash?"

Suyash did not respond.

"How did you feel coming here?"

Suyash had a derisive smile on his face.

"Very good .... I was filled with power."

Arihant said with the same soft smile, "You will be filled .... When you will abandon this needless bitterness and think deeply."


Suyash was irritated to hear ‘needless bitterness'.

"My sorrow seems to you to be needless. It will be felt. It is easy to get the applause of so many people by rote of a few things. If ever the calamity falls on you let me see how do you remember about this Shivoham."

Visakha tried to pacify Suyash.

"Carry on, son. It is also necessary to release the thoughts coming to the mind. Otherwise, how will the new thought take its place?"


Arihant still had a calm expression on his face.

"Suyash, are you the only person in the world who is suffering from sorrow. Once Gautam Buddha asked his disciples to bring alms from a house where there was no mourning. That day the disciple returned with an empty begging vessel."

"I have also heard such words of wisdom. But how do the sorrows of the world matter to me? What matters to me is my problem."


"But where is the concern for your problems? Had it mattered, you would not have been confined to this misery. You would have striven to get out of them.

"It's easy to talk. But hard to bear."

"No, that's not so hard. I'm saying."

"Well from which experience?"

Arihant had the same soft smile on his face again. He pulled his kurta up slightly. Then he carefully raised his lungi.


Suyash was taken aback. Vishakha also could not believe. Arihant's left leg was amputated below the knee. He had a prosthetic leg.

"When did all this happen? How did it happen? It doesn't matter. You just understand that I too have come out of that dark tunnel in which you are still locked. But know that you can also get out of this. And only you are to try yourself. "

Arihant stood up.

“Let me take leave. Shivoham is not false.”


That night Suyash just kept thinking about Shivoham. The morning really brought a new dawn. This morning he said to himself that he too would come out of the tunnel and prove it.

Suyash was trying. Vishakha was with him. He was looking for a new path. He was fond of reading detective novels since the early days of his youth. But he did not just study. He had so much in his own mind. But he never paid attention due to his interest in cricket.


One night when he was thinking of it sitting on the bed, Naved Khan was born. He came out of the bed excited and said. “Look, with this fake leg, I will become the biggest detective in the country. Why are you sitting like this? Hold my hand. We both will progress in the path to success. We both are complementary to each other.


The same night Suyash picked up his laptop. Giving him the body with words created Naved Khan, a great detective.

Now it was the sixth book in the “Naved Khan” series.

Suyash finds a way to liberate Naved Khan. He immediately wrote the next story. One chapter of the book was completed.

Suyash closed the laptop. He reached the living room in his powered wheelchair. Vishakha was shedding tears while watching the movie. Suyash smiled.

'Don't know what fun is derived from this melodrama.'


Vishakha looked at him.

"It's still time for the movie to end."

"I shall see along with you.”

“Leave it. It may not interest you. After the break, I shall give you food”

Suyash waited for the Advertisement Break.


THE END


On Fasting

"Though I bear joyfully the pangs of hunger and many other discomforts of fasting, let no one imagine that I do not suffer. These fasts are bearable only because they are imposed on me by a higher power and the capacity to bear the pain also comes from that Power."-M K Gandhi


शिवोहं 

★★★★★ 

© Ashish Kumar Trivedi

https://storymirror.com/read/story/hindi/9m59lkkg/shivohn/detail 

 

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