Just A Setback

The crusty boss was in an expansive mood. He appeared to be solicitous and ready to commune. Neela cursed her fate as she prepared herself for a bout of metaphors like “one has to be detached like drops of water on a lotus leaf”, ”find more in less” etc. After the boss finished, she wished “Good morning” and occupied her seat. She had to clear backlog and finish today’s slot. A tap on her chair and she knew who it was.”Mohan, don’t distract me; I have to do justice to these big fat files, dear. I am not as lucky as you are; all day long you just roam around in the pretext of business. God only knows whether you procure business, or simply pass your time.”

”Hey Neela, this is just too much…you cannot fathom the deepest roots and the core, what struggle every day I have to make to bring tier-1 clients is just beyond your comprehension even.” ”Ok, ok…cool down. Just joking, buddy. Don’t be so serious, else you will missing out fun of life.”Biting hard the other end of the ball pen, she threw a mischievous smile and said” How about spending this evening in coffee parlour, but please leave now, for God’s sake, else I shall not be able to finish my work and get permission to leave”.”That’s cool”, Mohan replied as he slowly moved towards the door.

Both Neela and Mohan did their MBA from the same university and knew each other since then. She was from an affluent family, he had modest upbringing. She was beautiful, accomplished and intelligent, was talk of the campus, he was plain ordinary looking, a simple down to earth meritorious boy. Yet, Neela had high opinion about him and was the first one always to strike conversation. She was impressed by his honesty and truthfulness. They joined the same company after completion. She was inducted in HR and he got into marketing. They were friends and more than friends now. Unabashed they moved, hand in hand, walked with confidence, caring a fig for what people would think or say. Their boss would often tell” Guys, why don’t you settle down, what are you waiting for?”They would exchange meaningful glances meaning …why the old man is unnecessarily interfering in personal matters, but only after he left the scene.

Christmas was in the offing. Shops were elaborately done. Roads were lit up. Malls were tastefully decorated. Food courts and eateries were full to the brim. Fun, frolic, mirth and laughter filled the air. Happiness was in surfeit and there was rapturous gleam in everyone’s eyes .Neela and Mohan treated themselves to lip smacking snacks and a rich brew of coffee, relaxed for a while in the evening and were ready to leave. Neela’s place of stay was a bit far and Mohan was ready with his bike to drop her. As he drove, Neela asked” Did you talk to your family members Mohan, you need to be serious now. There is a lot of pressure from my parents for marriage; there are good proposals, how long can I continue with …not now?” Mohan said” sorry dear, I have tried, but no one takes me seriously. They are looking for a match for my elder brother. My case is nowhere in the picture. Not my fault. Please try and understand.””Understood. Bye and Goodnight.” Neela jumped from the pillion and left in a huff. Mohan was unhappy and sorry. He cursed himself for not being able to divulge their love life to his parents. He resolved to do so now and get rid of nagging forever.

Two consecutive holidays on Saturday and Sunday made him fly to his home town. His arrival was not expected .His parents and other family members were surprised, yet, everyone was happy to see him. In the afternoon, when the entire family was savouring afternoon siesta, he quietly entered the room where his mother was resting. Sat on the bed for a while and whispered in her ear” Maa I have got to say something to you. Come to the verandah, I do not want to disturb papa”. She obliged. He sat on the ground, cuddling her legs.

His pleadings in choked voice brought out his intent and seriousness. He professed his fondness for Neela and suggested an early marriage, lest Neela’s parents would find a match and marry her off. It was not easy for her to honour his wishes, yet she assured him of the best results. After dinner was over and sweet dish served at the dining table where the entire family assembled, she initiated the topic in a subdued tone. “I am thinking of finding a match for Mohan. He is on the verge of getting his final call for a posting abroad. He may leave soon and would come back only when the company lets him. Sohan is prepared for a later date.”

Most family members were taken aback and objected to the very idea. However, enraged voices and feeble grumblings eventually subsided. The all pervasive mother could finally elicit consensus. Mohan seemed to have cleared the first hurdle of matrimony.”Hurray, my homecoming fetched me the ultimate reward. I am so happy for both of us. There will be ring ceremony in a week’s time and solemnization within a month, after the match maker finds out a suitable date.”…Mohan spoke in one breath. Neela was overjoyed. Things followed in quick succession and they became man and wife, took vow to be always at each other’s side till the ultimate separated them.

Their boss was happy, so also the colleagues for the newlyweds. Life went on; love filled the platter of togetherness. They worked harder to earn more, save more, for his modest upbringing had not much to offer. Mohan had to support his family back home too. He took up challenging projects to better their so called status, toured and stayed out of the town mostly. Neela, in her typical sacrificing avatar, took care of the house yet did justice to her job.

One evening, when she sat loaded with files, her demeanour almost dipped into the soggy details, and the number of people was thinning in the office, she was noticed by her boss, as he was leaving for home. He stood for a while to see her engrossed self before proceeding for the portico.”This lady is going to shine for sure, how hardworking, focused and mindful she is, she clears off desk before she leaves. She drafts so well, her presentations are so neat. I am going to reward her this season.” He told himself. There were supposed to be vacancies in overseas setups of their own company as well as their sister concerns’. He decided to post Neela in one of those as a recognition of her dedication.

The announcement, the next day bagged mixed reactions from her colleagues. Some opined this as sheer favouritism, to some, it was just and fair. A few others had to say this “when fate conspires to get you something, nothing can stop it”. Neela was ecstatic. Her first utterance was ”Mohan will be so happy to learn this. He always wanted me to rise and shine. ”She left office early in the evening. Cooked all his favourite dishes, waited with baited breath to spring a surprise on him. Mohan was on tour and was away for the last two days. He was to return in the evening. As his motorbike screeched to a halt near the entrance, her heart raced fast.

Finding her at home, at odd hour, he asked” what is up dear? How come you are so early? “Neela answered from the kitchen as she was giving final touch to dishes ”Guess what? A real surprise is waiting.” ”Surprise?”- “It is no more a surprise dear, I know you are in family way. Last week only the doctor confirmed, told Mohan.” “Oh no, dear! Neela quipped. God is very kind to us, I have been selected for overseas assignment. Our boss told me only today.”

”But how can that be Neela? How can you go alone and fend for yourself in an unknown country? Who will take care of you? You know no one there, better you turn down the offer politely. The boss will not mind.”Neela had not expected such reaction from Mohan, who was more than a friend to her. She lowered her voice and told this much” This perhaps is your male ego, that is speaking and not you. Had you been selected, I would gladly have wished you all luck and happy augury. I am interested to go Mohan. I can manage things on my own. You can join me later. We can earn a lot, shall construct a decent house for your parents with all amenities and make them happy.” Neela finished in one breath. A wry smile and a cursive glance was his answer.

Neela served dinner as Mohan took his bath and changed clothes. The quiet dinner was occasionally interspersed by sound of servings. Neela tried to initiate talk, but Mohan did not look up. He simply swallowed food and did not seem to savour his own favourites, carefully prepared by wife dear. He left for bed room right after, and hardly looked up. By the time she packed and kept leftovers in the refrigerator and wound up everything, he was asleep. This was something strange she could perceive, occurring for the first time in one year of their married life. She knew that, he was wide awake and just pretended to be asleep. After offering bedtime prayer, she wrapped a shawl around to keep her warm and tried to catch sleep, hoping everything would be fine, next morning.

But it was not to be. Mohan was full of grouse as he sipped bed tea. Neela was unhappy and hurt by such behaviour. That was very unbecoming of him she thought, unable to comprehend what went wrong. She was to give her consent for the overseas posting in two days time and had to get her passport and visa done as well, virtually had not much time on hand.

As they were having breakfast, she gently said ”I always had dreamt of an overseas assignment, climb the rung, and do well for myself. Hope you are happy with my decision. Why you are so silent Mohan? Is there anything wrong to choose a career after marriage? I can take care of myself and colleagues are very nice and helpful. God willing you too would join me in a few months time”. No answer was received. She took a heavy sigh, decided to be firm and go for the long cherished dream. Mohan became more businesslike in his talks and manners since the disclosure of overseas assignment to him. On some pretext or the other, had his food outside and came home late. The gnawing sense was conspicuous, yet all these did not deter her from going steady with her passion and goal. She remained cool throughout.

It was time for her to leave for London after completing all formalities. It was a Tuesday. The sun was bright all the way, perhaps was smiling at her long cherished dream nearing fruition.

Many of her colleagues had come to airport to see her off. Mohan was missing. Her roving eyes scanned each nook and corner of the place to find his trace, yet did not succeed. She had tried his number several times before coming but to no avail. It looked odd as the same question was repeated” what has happened to Mohan, where is he?” She took the excuse of his business trip to a faraway place, knowing well, the explanation was not convincing at all. Her trip was punctuated by strands of pain. Her mist laden eyes overflowed many a times, but her dark goggles saved from embarrassment.

After landing, the first thing she did was to call her hubby. His mobile was switched off. All her attempts were rendered fruitless. Before she could cry bitterly to ease her burdened self, company vehicle arrived, to take her to the place; she was to call home for the next two years. The apartment was nicely done, her quick glance could make out. She was tired and sat on the sofa, after pulling her baggage inside. All alone in the house, she missed Mohan, decided to leave a message”I terribly miss you. Wish you were there with me.” Even after lapse of a complete day, the message was unread. She did not know who to complain about the sordid state and could envisage a clear setback to her personal life. Yet she was not completely disheartened. Somewhere deep inside she nursed a hope that everything would be fine.

She was to join her new office a day after. One complete day was at her disposal. She thought of visiting a nearby park, a few monuments and do go shopping. There was not an iota of excitement, she missed the fun everywhere. Her body moved like a robot and the soul did not accompany her.

There was a warm welcome in the overseas office the next day. Peter, her new boss, seemed to be friendly. Kathy, the office assistant showed her table and wished her luck for the day. As she slowly unfolded the first file and started going through, she was called by her boss. He took a detailed stock of things, as to whether she likes the place where she is put up, any inconveniences so far, does she like the country, will she be happy to continue…etc. A faint smile followed by “yes of course” was her answer.

It took her a few days to learn the nuances of procedures to handle the new desk, but she picked it up fast. Her attempts to contact Mohan elicited answer only twice. He was curt and monosyllabic in his replies. Neela had to put up with his uncouth ways, hoping someday things will be fine. Someday, right sense would prevail upon and things would be as rosy as before.

It was Christmas Eve. The city and the country as a whole looked like a glittering parcel. People were busy shopping splurging on food clothing gifting and enjoying themselves. She was reminded of the festive days back home, especially the ones she spent with Mohan. It was strange that, he had not called her even once, since she came here. While returning from office, she brought dinner pack and thought of watching a movie to kill time at home. She sat down to check mail first, proceed for movie and dinner afterwards. As she scrolled down, she could find a small message from her hubby. ”Omg! At last! I knew this was going to happen. How can he not miss me amidst such festivities. I am sure he must be feeling lonely. After all, he dotes on me” she muttered in one breath. Her excitement came to a halt as she went through the message. “We vibe well no longer it seems. You better carry on with your professional pursuits. Our priorities have changed and I hold you responsible for this. I do not know if we can meet in near future, for, you will not be granted leave easily and I have no inclination to go there.”

She stared at the message on her computer, her mind racing so fast that the words were blurred. Just three lines and that was enough to make her life crumble. She was devastated. Tears welled up in her eyes followed by gentle sobs. For, she was married twice - once for love and once out of love. She sat on the sofa for hours and did not know what to do next. The dinner pack remained untouched, for she was no more hungry and thirsty.

The night was dark and darker the episode. Her attempts to amicably settle differences were not yielding results. Clinging to sweet nothings, deeply etched in her memory, brought her temporary relief and permanent solution, she felt, was eluding her.

She was unable to ascertain whether she was living or was pretending to be live. The night passed off amidst many a duel. Mind and heart rolled over to test her emotional break even. A sudden emptiness followed by complete isolation engulfed her. Her gaze remained fixed on the roof, but for how long she did not know. Darkness was dispersing-when she opened her eyes. It was advent of dawn. The sky wore crimson hue. Another day, another beginning she thought.

Shaking off niggling doubts, she took sturdy steps to the wash basin to clean her face. She kept the food in the microwave to heat it. ”How can I starve and keep my child hungry,” she muttered, and started taking big bites. ”I am not weak in the knees anymore, anyone listening? This is just a setback and not defeat.”

No more blinded by the glare, confused by incessant groaning of horns she was. Constant flicker of men and women on the road could not deter her focus. She got ready for a new day, opening vistas for new life. Started loving her –all the more and hurried towards gaiety.