Diwali At The Rodrigues House

This was our first Diwali after marriage.

"We don't celebrate other festivals", my mother had told Sarika a few days after our wedding, to which she had not reacted much. But Diwali being her favorite festival, she missed being with her family and relatives back home and she severely missed all the festivities associated with Diwali - the rituals, the decorations, the rangolis, and the puja. Three months into our love marriage, Sarika was hesitant about asking me if she could celebrate Diwali and did not discuss anything regarding this. But I had sensed her silence.

I am Daniel Rodrigues; whom people fondly call 'Danny'. Our family is originally from the historic coastal island town of Bombay, which was once colonized by the Portuguese. Rodrigues has been our family surname for centuries now and we live with a legacy left behind by our foreign ancestors. Here, in southern Bombay, now called Mumbai, we live in a 150-year-old chawl which is mostly occupied by Marathi and Gujarati families. A handful of households belonging to other communities have accommodation here, but overall, we stand together as one big family. We all celebrated every festival together in the Chawl's common front yard, be it Holi, Diwali, Dusshera, Eid, or Christmas. There was a feeling of unity all around, except within just one person, and that was my grandfather.

My grandpa was strictly religious and did not like us mingling with others, especially during festivities. As a kid, I always found it odd and asked my parents the reason for this.

I had grown up in a community where relationships and bonds of humanity had been considered the greatest virtue. Everyone around in our chawl was like a family member. We, the kids, played all around the premises and often visited each other's houses casually. We never knew what the difference was between the various surnames written on the tiny nameplates outside our doors, but my grandpa's deep-rooted concepts of religious barriers prevented him from freely accepting diversity in society in the modern era. However, my parents always asked me to ignore his old-school rigid mindset and bought me a pichkari on Holi and crackers on Diwali every year.

When I met Sarika and we fell in love, my grandpa was strictly against the intercultural wedding, but finally accepted it just for my sake.

Sarika is a quiet, simple Marathi girl, and she happily accepted our cultural norms quickly. She is loved by my parents and siblings, who make her feel at home all the time. To make friends with grandpa, she has been accompanying him every Sunday for the mass and has also learned a few hymns. Grandpa is not hostile towards her but remains indifferent.

Today morning, on the day of Diwali, Sarika was constantly peeping out of our door as she watched our next-door neighbor draw a beautiful rangoli at their entrance. "Sarika, come join me. Fill in some colors", Durga Aunty said, but Sarika was hesitant. She knew by doing so she would upset Grandpa.

Sarika spent the entire day longingly looking at our neighbors running around the chawl busy with the preparations of the Diwali rituals that were supposed to happen in the evening. My mother was speaking to her often, just trying to check if she was feeling alright.

Finally, by the evening, all our neighbors in the chawl decked up in the best of their clothes, lit up their houses with diyas, and gathered in the corridor to exchange sweets and wish each other "Happy Diwali". Just then Grandpa did something which none of us had expected.

He lit up two small diyas, which he might have purchased secretly, and placed them at the two sides of our main door. He also took out some more diyas from his old jute handbag and gave them to Sarika. She was surprised, but all of us were shocked to see the sight. He told Sarika, "Light them up and place them in and around our house". He also gave a brand-new golden and purple silk saree to her. "Go, get dressed, my child! Go and celebrate Diwali with others." he said in his regular coarse voice in a bland tone, "And Danny, you go with her too. Now you must celebrate all the festivals that she does". Saying so, he quietly receded to his tiny room.

There was a unique sense of joy in our family. We all were incredibly happy to see Sarika's smiling face and she felt lucky to have finally received an honest blessing and acceptance from Grandpa. She quickly changed into the saree Grandpa had given her as her Diwali gift. She touched his feet and requested him to join in the celebrations with her. To our surprise, Grandpa accepted it.

This year, we, all the residents of the Rodrigues house celebrated Diwali together for the first time; with a renewed ray of hope to follow this new practice each year from now onwards.