The Present

Can people really change?

I do not know

Perhaps they can

Or maybe they won’t

The changes in them we perceive

Just reflections of our expectations

Not reality

We only end up with questions

We don’t need

What is needed is objectivity

But how is one to teach a subjective heart objectivity?

When the mind itself doesn’t possess the proficiency?

Do we block ourselves for relations?

Friends or foes or family notions?

What does it take to see clearly?

I guess we should start with not getting teary

I want to believe this is for the best

I have to distance

Myself, tell myself not to get attached

But I fear I keep too far apart

That I stray away

Do not know the boundary to maintain

What do I share?

And what do I keep?

How do I stay detached but feel?

They push themselves away

Though I reach out a hand

To close this distance

The chasm in between remains constant

They lack the same motivation

As me

They try once, feebly

When our hands fail to grasp,

They leave me

Again I swing hither to dither

Neither here nor there

Wanting to fit in everywhere

Though I am accepted elsewhere

Here, they do not care

I want to share more

How much is just enough?

Teach me that border line

I hope that will be enough

I want to tell them to accept me with open arms

Go back to the way it was

But I can see their distrust

And I fear that I haven’t tried hard enough

One is ready to forgive

While the other pulls her back

I can see it in her eyes

She won’t give me another chance

The fault is not mine

I am not the cause of this tear

But I landed up alone on the opposite edge

People will say “just detach”

Don’t get too attached

Love them all the same

Show the same affection

Don’t judge, learn acceptance

Increase your patience

And everything will be okay

Everything is fine now

But it’s not so comfortable

There is that niggling voice

The speaker of my insecurities and fears

That prevents everything from being normal

However, this is not the end

It will continue like this

Though I hope it gets better

Never say never

Who knows, she might actually change

Or maybe she’s already there

I just have to work on myself

That’s the key to detachment, I guess

Don’t care so much about everyone else

Do that and you’ll be fine by yourself

Don’t worry, you have some ones else.