That Innocent Promise

I felt that miscellany when you held my little heart close to yours.

The miscellany of torment, affection and agony;

The admixture that blended into a thread of tears;

The thread that would, one day, spurn the river where we would float free.

I saw your anguish and felt my heart ache.

But I did not acquire the art of language then,

Having nothing but tears to express my analogous agitation.

But you apprehended that innocent emotion, I know you did.

In a moment of silence where nothing but your whispering love played music,

I slept in the embrace of your burning arms,

With nothing but a nightmare bothering me.

I tightened the hold of my little fingers around your thumb,

And you brought me closer to your heat.

The heat melted my nightmare,

But the water trickled on my forehead.

I thought it was magic, unable to conceive that you were the magician all along.

Your charms made my sorrows debilitate;

Your arms made my felicity rehabilitate.

Your innate resilience smoothed out the sharp edges of pain.

Oh! If I could only return the resilience to you!

It makes me feel so vulnerable and guilty now.

But soon my handicapped perception learned to articulate and protest.

I can figure out your reaction to my foremost expression-

"M..Ma.. Maaaa!"

It mystified and mingled me then;

But now I know the reason,

A reason too difficult for me to explain.

Gradually my abeyance ebbed away

And my aptitudes encased the dormancy.

But alas!

I would no longer be obscured in your fragile sheath of warm fragrance anymore.

I was growing up and the thought of isolation kept invading my mind.

I could feel your hunger pangs deep in my stomach,

Just a little more clearly.

So moving back to my nostalgic dormancy, I would hold you

Just a little more dearly.

I knew you were up all night

Covering my cold toes with the blanket;

And I promised to give you one night

Which would antagonize every agony,

Which would remove every sorrow,

Which would fill that knitted river with water.

But the world meant reality and that night seemed far-fetched.

"Do not worry Ma, we will be free one day...

Just endure a little more. I'll redeem you."