Resisting The Breakdowns...

As I stood in front of the mirror,

I screamed out of fear,

My mom came inside

I said:

"I am okay"

The phrase I hate to say,

All the time

Even when I am not really fine with it.

Tears rolling down my cheeks,

I still feel "that's okay"

My heart thumping & racing faster

And then also,

I think "okay"

My brain is encountered

With multiple questions:

"is that really okay?"

And I nod my head, "yes".

Silence just not for seconds,

But till it creates a space.

Sobbing nights &

Starving days.

My inner voice asks:

"am I okay?"

I said," I don't know!"

No work, no fame:

No light, no fight.

A thing called hope awakens within:

It also says" it's just okay! Darling"

Now there is no more fear,

Making me much lighter like it was never before.

I realized, 'it was okay to be okay sometimes.