Journaling of the unseen

My journal has pre-written dates

but some pages remain blank and others are on war until there is no space to fight. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

19.04.2021- Monday

This page was blank because met a God, a 'sin-washer'. 

He washes off the sins of all those who have ever committed any

and while washing becomes the sinner himself. 

Look closely, it is a soap- white, clean, soaked in water and germs. 

As it goes into my eyes, I see the dark matter of the universe that interacts with no other

and the water I search for becomes a mirage. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

20.04.2021- Tuesday

This page was blank because I saw a kingdom, an empire larger than all those that existed. 

A kingdom that looks like it was ruled by the 'Melon King' but now a queen sits on the throne

and expands her kingdom while I still try to understand how my nation was colonized and now I am a refugee. 

Look closely, it is a spider's web- a trap, my mind; a maze of words that I know I will never find the way out of

and now this poem becomes another wall in that maze; I need to escape,

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

21.04.2021- Wednesday

This page was blank because I saw a magic wand, maybe it belonged to Voldemort. 

A wand that is capable of creating things I never imagined could be created- Avada Kedavra and Wingardium Leviosa are used together. 

Who holds this wand you ask, my mother- she is both my Voldemort and Dumbledore. 

Look closely, it is a kitchen knife- sharp, shiny, washed in vegetable leaves and blood of all those who ever tried to attack me

and now if I tell her, I love her like Snape I hope she will understand I am not as execrable. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

22.04.2021- Thursday

This page was blank because I met a dragon, a fiery creature that dominates the lands and heavens. 

A creature that flies higher than the stars placed as the world looks at the shadow of the mighty. 

I see the stars falling as its legs hit them, and we make wishes to those have died.

Look closely, it is a chameleon- camouflages, a hidden creature, afraid of even the prey it aims for 

so it hides in any space it finds; a refugee like me it is. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

23.04.2021- Friday

This page was blank because I saw Medusa's snakes being trapped under the bars of a prison. 

The bars so strong they hold and pull her snakes until they die

but how do you call something a murder that does not even have a name. 

Look closely, it is a comb- untangling your hair, as they fall while sheep jump of the fence

so I fall asleep while losing every strand of the dreams I had and thus all I see in sleep is nothingness. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

24.04.2021- Saturday

This page was blank because I decided to bathe in the river I saw, Ganga they call it. 

The water so pure, it washes of all sins and sinners along with it

and unlike my soap, it remains germless. 

Look closely, it is your period blood- red, thick and non-perennial unlike Ganga

so I wash off my blood with water whose colour I am not aware of. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

25.04.2021- Sunday 

This page was blank because I met a mysterious creature- an angel on one side and a demon on the other. 

I can see now how Yin and Yang work together,

and how the world has both the lost and found. 

Look closely, it is you in the mirror- dead, just breathing, ignored like a rock under a flower

and so I just look at myself because no one else does.

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.

My journal has pre-written dates

but some pages remain blank and others are on war until there is no space to fight. 

They tell me- I have schizophrenia. 

I know I do not, I just see what their eyes turn blind to.