Help Me. Remind Me Why I'm Here

This is my song of melancholy.

It cannot be poetic or

Beautiful because 

My words are tired of

Singing about all the mellow feelings

I had to offer.

This is about the darkness, 

Shapeless and unending;

Slowly taking over my being.

And so, I declare it's a battle.

My mind,

The battleground.

But don't worry. I am

Fighting.

I am fighting for,

The rare warm rays of the sun that would fall on my 

The naked body on a cold winter day;

The gentle breeze that would caress my hair and keep me close to its bosom;

The fire which makes me capable to be kinder;

And the barren ground that lets my passions 

Run azure every day.

But sometimes I,

Blunt my own sword and 

Hammer my own shield;

Thinking what it would be like to

Free me from the weight of

All emotions;

To not be in this constant fight between

The calm and the chaos; 

To be unaware of which side I was truly fighting for.

They say that a human body is made

Of stardust.

Is this even the battlefield?

Or

Is this the black hole?