By The Lake

I saw her near the lake

As she was 20 years ago:

Little arms stooping,

Her youthful face had no wrinkles

But her eyes were dull

With love for the unlovable,

Pity for the unpitiable.

She had given parts of herself

For years more than her age

Until she met herself on a wednesday

Sitting in a black dress,

As the camera had captured her.

She saw what she had done to herself.

She tried to soothe the wan face,

Straighten the stooping shoulders,

Bring a smile on the 5 year old's face.

She recalled those for whom she had aged,

She had aged beyond her age.

There was anger in her now,

For none but herself.

For collecting bits and pieces

Of lives to mend,

Lives beyond repair.

She sat near herself,

Apologized to herself.

There was no one with her now

When she was beyond repair.

They continued to feed on each other,

She had let herself be fed.

She wished to unlive this life

A life with no love, no hope.

Since this life had no self

It had always been for others

Others who left her a living corpse

By the lake.