Namita Das is a 33 years old single mother to a 3 year old girl, a charted accountant working as an operations manager for a marine oil trading company. Her roots are from Kerala though she has spent a large chunk of her life in Dubai.
Somehow, I read her introduction again and again. She was a 33 years old, mother to a 3 year old daughter. I was 32 years old, mother to a 1 year old daughter. Though I wasn’t a single mother, I could relate to her. Something in her intro told me, she was divorced. Other than our ages and motherhood, I couldn’t find any similarity.
As she came on the stage, I felt envious. She was just a year older than me and so full of confidence. She looked so complete in herself; I wished I could be her.
Only after I heard her story I noticed her missing breasts. I wanted to talk to her but couldn’t move. I was sitting there still shocked by her story. It was only minutes before when I was envious and now I knew what she has been through in past four years. Pregnancy, divorce, giving birth to an adorable daughter, losing mother to breast cancer, being diagnosed by breast cancer herself, chemotherapy, news of ex’s remarriage. All these events came bombarding on her, one after the other.
My own life has been difficult for past 4 years and I was on the verge of giving up. But, my problems have nowhere been comparable to hers. And there she was, still smiling and getting ready for life.
After my daughter’s birth, my life has been at its best and worst, both at the same time. MIL’s hatred for me (even her attempts to get me divorced) came out openly, my husband and my Mom had been lying to me, it all came punching to my face. Amidst of all this, were my parents’ support, my husband’s regrets and promises and my daughter’s first smile, first eye contact, first word, crawling, walking and numerous other milestones. Almighty gave me difficult lessons but with beautiful moments to cope up with them.
Finally, I gathered the courage at the end of the event and spoke to her. Turned out, she didn’t look at herself as a confident and complete woman. We always undermine ourselves.
Namita Das, for what it’s worth, you did not make a difference, you actually saved my life.