Why Did You Kill Me?

Rajeev lived in a house in Gurgaon with his wife Shweta and his two and a half-year-old son Chinmay (Chinu). They were a happy family. Chinu had a lot of love for his father, so he slept always hugging his Papa.

One night Rajeev felt as if someone was trying to wake him up. When he opened his eyes he saw Chinu was on his chest. Chinu's eyes were very big and he seemed to be very serious. Chinu asked in a very serious and sad voice, "Why did you kill me?" Saying this he started crying. Rajeev felt that Chinu was scared because of a dream and so he held him to his bosom. Within a short time, Chinu fell asleep again. Everything was normal when he got up in the morning. Rajeev also forgot about the incident of the night. A week passed like this.

Just after a week, the same incident happened again. This time Rajeev told Shweta about the incident. Shweta got a little nervous hearing it because she believed that a similar incident happening for the second time could not be a coincidence. She asked Chinu in a roundabout way, but he could not tell anything, as he seemed to have not remembered the incident.Well, a week passed and nothing happened.

But the same incident happened exactly a week later. Just after getting up Chinu would ask only the same question to Sanjeev"Why did you kill me?”Saying this he started crying.

Now Rajeev and Shweta got worried so they decided to consult a doctor. They both went to their family doctor along with Chinu. The doctor saw Chinu, heard everything, but he could not find any problem. However, the doctor advised both that they should consult a psychiatrist because Chinu's problem was more psychological than physical.

The anxiety of Rajeev and Shweta increased. Rajeev came to know of a psychiatrist who was a specialist in children's diseases. They both went to her along with Chinu. The doctor was a very experienced and sensible lady. She heard everything, checked up Chinu and then asked Rajiv and Shweta to sit outside. Both came out and the doctor, giving a toy, made Chinu sit near her and started talking to him in her own way.

After an hour, the doctor called both of them inside and asked them to sit. The doctor started telling in a serious tone, “Rajeev Ji, I have talked to your son in great detail and you may be well aware that we extract everything from inside of a person which one may not even know. Casually I would like to tell you what I have learned from Chinu. It is quite likely that you may find my words strange but it may have some truth. From Chinu’s version, it seems that he is reborn, and in the previous birth the death was accidental and unnatural and in some way or the other you are responsible for the death. That is why Chinu repeatedly tells you “ Why did you kill me?”Being a doctor it is difficult for me to believe but his statements indicate that. You try to remember whether any such incident had happened with you, in which someone had died because of you? " 

Rajeev tries to remember, but he could not recollect any such incidence. All the three come home, but the doctor’s words still ring in Rajiv’s mind. At night while sleeping, Rajeev again tries hard taxing his brain when he remembers about the purchase of a new car about 6 years ago. One day, he was leaving late at night from office for home when his car collided with a motorcycle at a secluded place. Due to the collision, both motorcycle and the person riding on it fell by the side of the road. Because the car was new and the accident took place in a secluded area at night, Rajeev got scared and so he didn’t stop his car. Rajeev narrated the whole incident to Shweta and also told her that he was not aware whether the people were alive or dead.

Both of them were scared and worried. Rajeev told Shweta that he has resolved to find out the whereabouts of that dead person because he has hopes of finding a way of Chinu’s recovery from there. When Rajeev started to find out, he came to know that the victim had died on the spot due to serious injury. The report was registered at Manesar police station and the man was identified, but the case was closed as the address of the car owner could not be found out. The detailed statement and the name of that person were available in the police station. Rajeev could get the name and address of that person. Now Rajiv and Shweta decided to go there and find out as to what had happened. 

The next day, both of them with Chinu reached the address. Upon reaching the door of the house, Rajeev looked towards Chinu, but he was quite normal. It was an old house, Rajeev knocked on the door with a throbbing heart. After a while, a woman of about 40 to 45 years opened the door. Rajeev told that he was an old friend of Rahmat Bhai (dead person) He had returned to the city after many years and came to know about the death of Rahmat Bhai. He had come to find out the welfare of the family. That woman told me that she was the wife of Rahmat Bhai. Apart from herself, she has her two sons and the aged father of Rahmat Bhai, in the house, who was unable to walk. The children are too small so the responsibility of managing the house was with the wife of Rahmat Bhai.

Rajeev and Shweta were very sad about hearing this. Rajeev felt that he was responsible for everything. During the talk, Rajeev and Shweta looked towards Chinu but there was no particular reaction seen on him. After some time, they took leave from them and left for their house. On the way, Shweta asked Rajeev why did he not mention Chinu to those people. Rajeev said that from Chinu's reaction, it did not look that he knew the house or the people of that house and it was not known what those people would have done after knowing everything. From Rajeev’s point of view, they should be cautious in their moves.

In the meantime, the same incident happened again when Chinu woke up Rajeev and asked: “Why did you kill me?”He started crying after that. Rajeev held him to his bosom and told “I took you to your house but you could not recognize. Chinu looked at Rajeev in a strange manner and told in a loud voice, “No, that was not my house”. By telling this he cried profusely.

Shweta, who was listening to their talk, got very much scared. After a few moments, Chinu slept but Rajeev and Shweta could not get sleep. Both of them were in a dilemma as to what to do and where to go.

Once again they thought of talking to the psychiatrist, Rajeev took an appointment from the doctor for the next day. At the appointed time, both of them went to the doctor along with Chinu. Rajeev told the doctor everything that had happened until now. After listening to everything, the doctor also got immersed in deep thoughts. She told both of them to sit outside and started chatting with Chinu. Gradually, Chinu, coming under the doctor’s hypnosis, started telling the whole thing.

After talking to Chinu for two hours, the doctor called Rajeev and Shweta inside. The doctor's eyes were moist. Looking at Shweta, the doctor asked, "Shweta, if you don’t mind, I want to ask you a few personal questions." Shweta responded immediately, "Doctor, if it is related to my son's illness, then you may ask whatever you want." The doctor sent Chinu along with the nurse to the other side and started talking to Shweta, "Even before the birth of Chinu, you were pregnant once, but you had a miscarriage, is it true?"

Shweta told with a little uneasiness, "Yes, but how is it related to Chinu?”

The doctor looked through the eyes of Shweta and asked, why did you have an abortion?

Shweta did not say anything but looked at Rajeev.

Rajeev told,” Doctor this is an incident one year after our marriage when we were not fully prepared to have a child.

The doctor interrupted his talk and asked,” Whether it was the only reason or something more?”

Shweta started crying after hearing this.The doctor continued, “I want to hear the truth, Rajeev Ji from your mouth”.

Rajeev’s face showed fear and uneasiness. He said, “The fact is that we came to know it was a girl. I wanted my first child to be a boy. So I convinced Shweta to abort her pregnancy.”

The doctor told,” So you killed your own daughter before her birth. Today having come as your son he is asking for an answer for your killing. Yes, Chinu is the rebirth of the same daughter. You must be ashamed if you literates can resort to such things how will we be able to make others understand? Go and ask for an apology from your daughter. Hope she may pardon you as is the nature of all daughters. But I and our society will never pardon you.”