The Turning Point

Oh my God! Monday already! Shaking off my lethargy I looked at the clock. It was nearing seven! Disha had not got up yet. Her school bus would promptly arrive at 7.30 and if we were late, the driver would not wait. Waking up a kid deep in slumber is a difficult task, but it had to be done. I woke up the sleepy kid, placed her on the toilet seat and after instructing her to brush her teeth by the time I returned, went to the kitchen to whip up a quick breakfast for her and also pack her lunch. As I kept her lunch box in her school bag, I saw that she had not arranged her books according to the time-table! Hurriedly I collected her books which lay all over the place and called out to her. Getting no response from her I rushed to the bathroom only to find her fast asleep. I would have won hands down if only there was a contest for getting an 8 year old ready for school in less than five minutes. I managed to stuff her with some breakfast and almost dragged her for 500 meters to the bus stop. We just managed to get the bus by which time I had already given her a sermon for her laziness. I then mechanically waved out to her and made my way back home. On the way, I stopped to collect some eggs as Kirit had wished to have a double omelet for breakfast. I also had to pick up his white shirt which had been given for ironing. 

Once home I smelt something burning – it was burnt milk. It must be the neighbors again, I thought to myself, but as I entered the kitchen, to my horror I found that this time, I was the culprit. In my hurry, I had not switched off the gas while taking my daughter to the bus stop. All the milk had evaporated and the pot was totally black! There was no milk for Kirit’s coffee even. I suddenly remembered that I had some milk powder stashed away for an emergency, but I had to rack my brains and almost clear the whole fridge to locate it. Precious minutes of the morning went into this exercise and I could not afford to spend any more time trying to put back the things in the fridge as I was already behind schedule. Anyway, with the brightest smile, I could manage, I woke up Kirit with a cup of coffee and then rushed for my bath. Only after I went in did I realize that I had not switched on the geyser! On a cold December morning, I had to compromise with a colder shower. I quickly got dressed and re-entered the kitchen.   

Having kept the pan on the gas, I broke the eggs and poured them out in a bowl to whisk them. In my hurry, the whisk hit the edge of the bowl, toppling it and spilling all the contents over me! Another messy job needing cleaning up! All this commotion did not reach Kirit’s ears at all as he was totally engrossed in the newspaper. After mopping up the damage on the floor, I thought of an alternative to the omelet.   In the meanwhile, Kirit had got ready and was at the table waiting for his breakfast. I toasted a cheese sandwich and placed it before him. “No eggs? I had told you that I wanted an omelet today?!” Losing my patience I yelled at him that if he wanted he could have this or go without breakfast. I was myself on a diet plan and so just picked up an apple and kept it in my bag. The egg spill on my sari compelled me to change into another one which hardly matched the blouse I wore, but I could not care less.  Fortunately, Kirit had a luncheon meeting and so I was spared the trouble of packing his lunch. I had planned to have my lunch in the office canteen itself, so all I had now to do, was lock up the house and leave.

Kirit was already in the car and I rushed to join him. There were roadblocks and diversions on the way and I reached office quite late. By the time I had settled down, work had piled up and in my unpleasant mood, did not know where and how to get started. My day had begun badly and I tried to retrace to find out where I had gone wrong. I had a look at the workload which was quite heavy but that there was nothing that was very urgent and so decided to take a day off and went home to get some peace of mind.

Once home, I was relieved to see that my maid had arrived and was already at her job. Dishes were stacked in the sink, clothes were waiting to be washed, dried clothes to be folded, sweeping, mopping, dusting, watering the plants…… the list was endless. Bindu, my maid was in her fifties but was quite agile and very efficient. The speed with which she went about her work amazed me. She worked in another four houses in our building and for the six years that she was with me, she never gave me any chance to complain. None of the others too had any complaints against her.

I felt I had had enough for the day – nothing seemed to go right. I just stretched myself on the sofa and started watching Bindu. Truly it must be quite a boring thing for her to do the same mundane chores every day from house to the house apart from her own housekeeping. I started conversing with her and soon she opened up. I asked if she never tired herself of doing the same jobs unfailingly day in and day out every day. I was taken aback at her reaction. 

“Memsahib, why should I ever feel bored or tired? When you go to the office and do your work, do you feel tired? That is your source of income and surely, you would strive to do your best to earn a good name and secure promotions. I look at my job in the same way. I have two grown-up children and I am happy that I could educate them reasonably with the money I earned. Being a single parent has not been easy for me, particularly when my husband left me for another girl when I was only twenty years old with two kids. To survive in this male dominated society was a challenge for a good looking young woman deserted by her husband. Fortunately, my mother had brought me up to be self-dependent and I could earn a decent livelihood. Now my sons are grown up and I am sure that soon they will find themselves jobs and then let me relax. They always speak highly of my mother, their grandmother and look up to her with great reverence as she was self-made and caring. 

I gain my strength from remembering my mother who brought me up along with six siblings. She had been married into a large family of five brothers and three sisters and she was the eldest daughter-in-law. This was nearly sixty years back and in those days there was no cooking gas in the house and she had to cook for the large household on firewood or charcoal. Since my aunts were kids, the responsibility of feeding the household lay squarely on her shoulders as my grand-parents left on a pilgrimage the very day after she got married. 

She went through hard times drawing water from the well, tending to the cows, fetching the rations, keeping the house clean by frequently smearing cow dung on the floors to keep it pest free, sending her brothers and sisters in law to school having packed their lunch. There was no respite for her from dawn till night. I was the eldest in our family having arrived within a year of their marriage. My grand-parents had returned from their pilgrimage to look after me and my siblings after they were born, but my mother was saddled with more work and tensions. My father was hot tempered and my mother was the shock absorber between my father and his parents. Soon we all grew up and got trained in all the housework and it was healthy competition amongst us siblings as to who worked the best and most! 

Being the eldest daughter-in-law, she discharged her responsibility of finding suitable matches for her husband’s siblings. How she managed the household expenses was something no one could make out. There was no count of the number of times her jewelry was pledged and redeemed! She never failed to take good care of her parents-in-law, who lived with her till the end. She always looked fresh and cheerful and never for a moment felt that she was overworked. She went out of the way to satisfy our desires and now when I look back, I am awe-struck at the manner in which she found time for all of us! All that grooming has stood me in good stead and today I am not ashamed of being a housemaid, but on the contrary, I can lift my head proudly to say that with her blessings and Divine Grace, I have inculcated good values in my sons by educating them. I am happy to be of use to people like you, for which I am adequately recompensed too!”

It was an eye-opener for me. Here I was, an engineer holding a Master’s degree in Business Administration, struggling to organize mundane housework. Bindu’s mother, on the contrary, an illiterate woman seemingly effortlessly but very efficiently had single handed managed a large household without grumbling in the least! Truly inspired, I was happy I had called it a day at office. That afternoon was spent in setting the house in order and ordering all necessary groceries so that I need not rush for things in the morning. More than anything else, I decided that come what may, I would sport a bright smile.

Disha was excited to see me at the bus stop to receive her. She was delighted to see I had also baked her favorite pastries for her. “Mummmeee”, she hugged me. Tears rolled down my cheeks and I wiped them before she could see. This bonding, this small show of affection was indeed priceless!

When Kirit came home, he too was pleasantly surprised to see the cushions spruced up and the whole house neat and clean. The faint fragrance of a room freshener was lingering and welcoming. Instead of my pouting mouth, he was happy to see my bright smile which soon shifted to his face! By the time he had returned from office, Disha had finished her homework, arranged her time-table for the next day and was ready to spend quality time with both of us.

We had a simple but lovely meal and as we went to bed that night I shared with Kirit the secret of the change in my attitude. When an illiterate woman could happily manage a large household and be an inspiration to her children and grandchildren, it was high time I learned a lesson from her! From that day onward, I planned and prioritized my activities and never for once had to lose my cool.