The Forgotten Rose (Part 2/2)

[This is the continuation of the previous part] 

A few months later, James was at Ava’s house to return her novel. Ava made two cups of coffee and joined James who was sitting in the living room.

“This is for you Ava, ” said James as he protruded his hand carrying a bright, red rose as soon as Ava sat down on the sofa.

“For me? But why?”

“Because you are as beautiful as the rose,” continued James.

Ava Ballard lowered her head as she smiled shyly.

“Thank you, James!”

James’ joy knew no bounds when Ava accepted his rose unlike all the hundreds of roses that had often been offered to her over the years. No one said a thing but the silence was full of answers— answers to the questions that both Ava and James had hidden in their hearts. They chatted and laughed as they spent a loving time with each other. It was one of the very few instances that Ava seemed so very happy. Her words, her gestures oozed happiness. Only Amanda and a few of James’ friends knew about the feelings Ava and James had for each other.

James used to visit Ava’s house frequently . The two would go out together for coffee or for a walk in the streets during the summer dusks. It seemed that the elements of nature— the trees, the flowers, the birds, and everything augmented their beauties just to complement the two lovers who held hands as they walked amidst them.

“Would you ever return? Oh! If you do, would you look at me the same way you used to?”

Everything was going so well, so beautiful but it was after a few months that an emotional catastrophe hit Ava. She realized that James would ignore her at times and would often not acknowledge her presence around him. His interest in her seemed to glide from his heart as his loving demeanour r did from his behaviour. The walks down the streets, the coffee dates, exchanging small gifts from flowers to key-rings gradually reduced to null. They hardly met outside the college. Even in college, they hardly interacted with each other. Even though Ava wanted to spend time with James, he would turn a deaf ear to her. His behaviour towards her was as repulsive as the world's acceptance for Ava. 

“What happened James?” “What’s wrong with you?” asked a teary-eyed Ava one day as they were walking down the corridor after class.

“What?” answered James as if Ava was some stranger.

“What? Why don’t you talk to me?”

“No. I, um—“ “I need to go.”

James walked off hurriedly.

The next day Ava learnt from Amanda that James had been making portraits of some other girl in their class and would often be spotted with her at cafes. Anger was prominent in Amanda’s voice as she disclosed the particulars to Ava. That evening Amanda went to Ava’s house. She was crying like a child. Fortunately, she had a shoulder to cry on at this stage unlike a huge chunk of folks.

“What went wrong Amanda?” “What happened all of a sudden?”

“Just call him and ask.”

Ava looked at her with questioning eyes.

“Yes. Just call him and ask.”

Ava rang James. He picked up the third time.

“You told you loved me!”

“Yes, I did but I think my feelings have changed. I don’t want to trouble you Ava and you don’t trouble me as well.”

“How dare you?” shouted Amanda as she snatched the mobile phone that was on speaker.

“Is this Amanda? Oh! Why do you shout at me?” “Can a person’s feelings not change?” said James mockingly. “Well, of course, it can! And in two months we would be done with our college and never see each other again.”

“What nonsense is this?” Amanda went completely berserk.

“Yes! And then she too would forget me. Out of sight, out of mind, you know. This sadness is perhaps temporary.”

“No! it’s not!”

“Ah! That’s what happens these days, Amanda. I have seen my friends and acquaintances. She’s going to be all right. Just give her the time, if you would.”

“Bye Amanda and Ava!” said James as he hung up.

Even Amanda was in tears by now. Ava has never been so shocked. The heaviness in the air occupied them both. Ava was dumbstruck. All her dreams seemed to split and vanish into thin air, in front of her eyes. An end to anything beautiful brings with it immense pain, especially for the one who invests the most in its beauty but the pain is even more elevated when the ending is rather bland. 

Misery now smote Ava. For days, she didn’t come to the college. When the professors asked Amanda about her, she said that Ava is a bit sick and would return to the class soon. Ava would not eat or sleep properly. She looked so tired all the time. She would break down every now and then. Amanda visited her regularly and would teach Ava whatever was taught in the class but Ava’s mind dwelled far away— in some other land, maybe in a land where she sought answers to her questions; she looked rather blank and lost.

Their final exams were in a month and a half. Amanda feared that Ava might flunk her exams but luckily, she didn’t. She dragged herself with surplus mental efforts to study little each day. Her exams went satisfactorily though not as good as she had done in her previous exams at all but she was sure to pass.

“The stars, the moon, and the trees remind me of you...”

Ava’s condition was gradually worsening.

“You need to see a therapist, Ava. I know somebody. We shall go tomorrow.”

Ava nodded her head and smiling slightly, in a very low tone she said, “I last saw him on 28^th March— our last exam was then.” “Will I never see him again?” inquired Ava.

“I wish you never do!” exclaimed Amanda with noticeable anger in her voice. “Come, we’re getting late for coffee,”

“Yes. Let’s go,” agreed Ava.

Amanda cared for Ava just like a sister, or even more than that. She had been with her through thick and thin. She informed Ava’s parents about her condition and took her to a celebrated therapist. Ava’s mother was a bit hesitant to send her daughter to a psychotherapist at first but on insistence from her dad, she agreed.

Ava seemed to recover slowly within a few months. She would still break down at times but less frequently. She was healing.

“I am writing a story— a story on a broken girl and how she deals with her situation and succeeds—a novel maybe,” Ava told Amanda one day as both were having coffee together at Ava's place.

“Very good. Show me!”

“It’s a secret,” Ava said as she smiled mischievously.

“I’ll thrash you!”

“Okay! Here you go.” Ava handed a notebook kept beside her to Amanda.

“Wow!” “Oh my God! This is your best to date!” Amanda exclaimed as she read some pages.

Ava smiled. 

“I will finish it within a few months I guess.”

“There’s so much pain in your words, yet the lines are beautiful.”

“I write lines that I feel,” Ava said smilingly.

“You are becoming more beautiful each day.”

“It’s your eyes that perceive me so.”

Amanda was right. Any pair of eyes would in fact acknowledge the fact that Ava was beautiful enough to captivate the heart of even the emotionless. Her smile, her eyes, her gestures were graceful and full of pain, yet they would furnish mirth and ecstasy to anyone beholding her.

Ava got her novel published with the help of one of her professors. It was a very renowned publishing house. Ava's good time had started. Within a few months, the novel that she wrote putting all her soul into it, became a bestseller. Ava started getting offers for contracts from one of the best publishing houses of the country. Ava chose to work with the house that published her first novel. Amanda’s writing career had also taken off. Ava Ballard and Amanda Dahl had become two of the most prominent names among the new authors. They even lifted the names of their respective publishing houses to a great measure.

“Even the mirror reminds me of you..”

It was now two years since Ava had seen James. One day, Amanda was at Ava’s place for lunch. Their friendship was one of the strongest bonds that they have ever experienced. The two friends talked and laughed together when Ava’s phone rang.

“Hey, Ava!” – It was a voice that Ava would never forget on this side of the grave. She knew that she was breaking apart. Time and again had she felt this but this was perhaps the last time. Her mind was fluttering by like an avian species, rushing towards all the memories she had carefully preserved with extreme idolatry. Her heart, having served as the palette for her emotions, was now devoid of any emotion, just as the seven hues, blended together, leave no trace of colour, but create a plain, placid, virgin hue. Her state demanded the immediate necessity of sympathetic, non-judgmental arms, that would hold her tight, to avert the covert, invisible disbandment of her painfully fissured emotions into the thin air.

“James?” she replied as she regained her strength and put the phone on speaker.

Amanda was scared for Ava’s emotional health.

“Hey! How are you?”

“I am good.”

“Um.. Ava, I have been thinking about you a lot lately. I think we should be together. What say?”

Ava was silent. Amanda held her hand and was going to whisper a big ‘NO’ when James spoke again.

“Ava Ballard, will you marry me?”

“James, I am just shocked.”

“So… What’s your answer?”

Before Amanda could interfere, Ava said, “No, James. I am not going to marry you. I can’t be with someone whose mind changes in a wink. I am sorry James.”

“But you love me, right?”

“Yes, I do James. I still love you but I love myself more now. My self-respect, my honor, and my emotional health are my priorities now.”

“But…”

“No, James. I wish you all the luck and love in life but I don’t see us together.”

A teary-eyed Ava disconnected the call.

“I am so proud of you.”

“Thank you,” Ava smiled and hugged her soul-sister.

Miss Ballard’s string of thoughts was broken as a teardrop tickled her cheeks.

The sunlight was no more entering directly through the eastern window as the sun had set on its monotonous journey towards the west. Miss Ballard closed the novel she was reading— the same novel that James once touched and read and loved.

Miss Ballard’s phone suddenly rang. It was from Amanda.

“When are you leaving the house? You remember about our lunch, right?”

“Of course, I do. I am leaving just in ten minutes.”

“Okay. I have already left. A journalist called me up and said he has a couple of questions for us.”

“Okay!”

“The world has lesser but not no smiles without you. Oh, dearest!”

Ava wiped her tears and smiled looking in the mirror. The roses in the vase were still fresh and cheerful.

“Have a good time with your bestie, Ava and give an excellent interview,” Ava gushed as she looked in the mirror. She paused the song on her phone and quickly began getting ready.

 Ava never heard from James in five years. She didn’t know where he was and would probably never see him in her lifetime. Ava chose her honour over the man she loved. Nobody knew what feelings James had for Ava now. Maybe the girl whom he once declared to be as beautiful as a bright, red rose was probably as forgotten as a dead, withered rose now.

           - - - - THE END - - - -