But, Fell For Each Other

It was April 2013 when I shifted my hostel from a place to another. I was new for that location but still, some people knew me. I used to walk at night with my roommate and we loved to do so. I never have had such feeling in my life as I had with that guy and I think no one can replace him. I was walking with my friend and we covered about 4-5 km from our pg. Then, she saw a Fulki (different names are there tikki, fulki ,pani puri,golgappe, gup chup) Stall, she loves fulki so much and started forcing me to have some. I couldn't say no, we both reached there. There was a guy who was continuously looking at me.

I noticed many times but I didn't react. After that day whenever I crossed that stall, I kept an eye on him because every time he was looking at me if I am around him. I don't know, whether he wants to say something or whatever it was. After 4-5 months, I decided to not to go that side but my roommate was a big fan of his Pani Puri and I couldn't share my problem with her. When I went there(after 3-4 months) he looked at me and just came close to me I was a bit scared I was thinking about what he is going to do. Should I go back? Actually, he was the owner of the shop, he worked there with his father and 2-3 workers, the shop is famous in that area. He wanted to say something but as his father was there so he just staring at me till the time I was there. I was so frustrated somewhere, somehow. I wanted to sort out all this but with whom and how? There was no one who could understand.

I think that was Sept 2013 when I came to know he is a good person and he never used to do such things. I felt so good and then I started to go there with all my heart. I noticed him that he really doesn't stare any girl near him. One day, I was crossing the way to reach college and when I saw "he was riding a bike and crossed the way with all focus at me".Honestly, I didn't have any feeling for him at that time. As days, months passed away I became someone whom he wants to look at, on a daily basis. One day, his father called him by the name "Karan" that was a pleasure to my ear (He is one of the most good looking guys I have seen in my life). Frankly, the name of a person matters a lot to me. I don't want to use any kind of lie and in my opinion better to hide things than to lie.

When I came back to the hostel I turned on my laptop and searched for his name on Facebook "Karan Jain". I got 2000 + results for this name and finally, I got his ID and when I visited his profile I was pretty sure he doesn't use Facebook on a daily basis. Nevertheless, I sent a friend request. After a day, I went to my hometown for vacations of 15 days. One day, I got a notification like "Karan accepted your friend request, write something on his timeline".I was so happy,I didn't feel that kind of happiness ever in my life and I was waiting for his message (I had decided to not to ping him by message, if he want to talk he will message me) and after 2 days I got his message,message was "Hey you! I think I know you, Are you the girl who mostly used to come to my shop to eat pani puri"?

I opened the message but didn't reply, then after some hours I got a long message of him (I knew if I don't reply he will surely share what he want to say or whatever thing was going in his mind), the message was full of feelings, emotions. He wrote "hello Shraddha,how are you".I hope you know about my status, I am neither rich nor well educated as you are. I don't want to create a fake impression on you. I read the message and replied "Hey, thanks for accepting my request, I sent you request because I have a bunch of question on my mind, I want to know why you used to stare at me, even when your father is there. He said I want to be your friend. I don't have any friend. Though I don't use Facebook that much I will use daily just to talk to you. After 4-5 days, he asked for my number and made his first call to me "I was thinking, am I choosing some wrong way and many such questions were strumming my mind".I ignored his first call, he sent me a message on Facebook "may I know the reason, why are you ignoring me".I said, I was busy and didn't look at the phone".He replied, "I know I am not a good choice for friendship. You must have good, rich and educated friends". It's alright, I will not irritate you again. Apologies!

I am forgetting actual words, the message was simply telling I know why you didn't receive my call, you don't want to be my friend because I am not educated and rich.

I felt bad and I called him (We used to call after 10:30 p.m. because it was the time when he became free from his work),that was first and great talking with him. We started to talk on a daily basis through calls, messages, and Facebook. After a year, I felt something for him and I told him that I like to talk to you and I want this magic forever but he sent so rude reply "I like someone else". I was completely broken, I didn't ping him after that message I deleted his number and after 3-4 months it was 2:35 a.m. I received 11 missed calls and 9 messages from an unknown number. I checked the number but couldn't recognize the person and when I opened the messages I came to know that the sender is no one but Karan. All his messages were full of regrets, apologies and one of them won my heart "he wrote no one is there in my life, I didn't want to ruin your life, you deserve someone much better than me that's why I said so", but it was impossible to live without you, you didn't even come to this side. I missed you so much and all such touching words. I replied to him "Now, what?"I don't have anything for you, not even apologies. Live and let me live. But, still, he sent me messages like sorry and all. I accepted his apologies. After someday he proposed to me, I said, Yes! (that was April 2015 and also time to leave his city)

After 2 days of the day he proposed to me I had to leave the city, he wanted to meet me, we didn't meet before, he came to the station but unluckily we couldn’t meet.

It has been 2.5 years of my relationship with him, you won't believe we didn't meet yet. Just, we used to look at each other from distance. 1000 of times we broke up but after 2-3 or 5-6 days he came back into my life, though such break-ups are distracting me somewhere from my dreams. I have a bunch of dreams into my eyes and one by one I have to complete them all. He always uses this line "you deserve someone else much better than me".Still, we are not talking, we fought on 2nd August and then he appeased me by 9th Aug and then we fought by 15th Aug and this fighting is still going on. Every time he used to say good-bye forever, I never used such words. This relationship is beyond anyone else relation and of course, best among all. He is not like other (As we all know what are the basic needs of a boy in a relationship)I am proud of myself that I fell for him.

Talking to each other over phone kept my relationship strong. There is an adage "a spark neglected burns the house" and that spark was his poorness in my case. It has been more than a year since we are not talking to each other. He is a coward. He doesn't have guts to face problems, I don't want to be with such a person.

Everything happens for a reason.