Admiration

Gripping the cup of coffee in my hand with my earphones plugged, I took a seat on the windowsill of my room. I looked out to see the tar-black sky and the large clouds awaiting a heavy downpour. No sooner had I heard a tapping on my window than the pitter patter dance of the rain drops masked all the chaos and created a soothing melody as the essence of the wet soil mesmerized my soul. I assessed the profound rhythm of the steady drumming of falling rain. It can make one cry and vent out one's sadness or it may make another leap for joy in sheer happiness.

Whilst my Spotify playlist played "Dil kya kare jab kise se, kisi ko pyaar ho jaye", I was taken down the memory lane where I stepped into your moments. It was the very first song you sang to me though you never really dedicated those lines to me. But I loved the way you sang it so imperfectly; sometimes you either lost your tune or the lyrics went wrong. Thought fragments flashed recollections of our never-ending conversation, our humorous chit chats, your sweet giggles, your cute tricks to make me laugh when I was in no mood to talk and there's so much more about you man! 

Honestly , I didn’t think I’d fall this hard for you. Fighting back the urge to text you or call you, reminding myself that actually I mean nothing to you, carrying a gloomy heavy heart to the memories of shattered folds, I can't help but sit up in bed awake until 2 am as amalgam of emotions thunders in my chest and the air turns heavy with impending rain. There are certain times I believe I’m over it, but then as soon as something reminds me of you , I discern I’m still missing you more than ever. My ailing heart is stuck on its way to figure out what actually went wrong between us. 

I hope, I'll get over it someday :"

Abruptly, that sudden boom of the thunder brought me back to reality from the aphonic nostalgia drowned in melancholy. I felt my heart throbbing in pain as those tears of agony rolled down my cheeks. And then I looked around to the coffee mug; the coffee was icy cold by now

Yet another unvoiced feeling questioned myself, 

WHY DON'T YOU MISS ME LIKE I DO?

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