Shells Of Fear

Not long ago

Since my broken pieces were my whole

What I present is not me

My laugh doesn't show my happiness

My sparking eyes don't show the saline droplets

Am I more than just my body

Is what I question?

Deep within I tremble in fear

The wish to escape eats me.

My timid legs no more feel brave getting out.

My heart and brain constantly fight

The war between my fear and courage plagues my sleep

There, with the dawn

My courage fades.

A simple touch triggers a memory

My hands shudder to make contact with my loved ones.

My eyes dread exchange with other souls

And I step back having that haunting memory.

They say the punctual waves of time will pass

Only if they knew that the shells of fear live forever.

The shadow never goes nor does the hand

He will never vanish nor will his touch.

They don't know he is behind me, never letting me forget 

And making me relive those quandaries

They will never know

That I'm not an ideal victim

But an ideal Victor!