Hope And Devotion

It was funny how my heart ached every single time I thought about him,

My mind was trying to find closure,

But my heart was looking for its next fix.

I was depressed,

I knew I wouldn’t be able to ever make to his side of the world,

He wouldn’t let me.

I was angry at myself,

How did I become this obsessive asshole who didn’t know how to quit,

Who didn’t know what was good for her and her ego.

I was hurting,

For every time I let him creep into my mind,

My soul would start weeping for itself.

I was torturing myself towards destruction,

Without knowledge of handling immense, inexplicable pain.

I was in a peril,

Conscience shaken,

But this hope of a better tomorrow kept me on a leash.

I was surprised,

A billion smiles and voices on this planet,

Still my spirit would wander off,

Every time he called my name.