Unspoken Fantasies

The sunlight streamed through the thin curtains as I woke up from my deep slumber. I knew the drill like the back of my mind. Wake up, pretend you want to be a C.A to make my parents proud, and sleep again. But my mind lingered on another thought. Perhaps, I was scared to inform my parents that I want to become a director instead of C. A.

Being born in an orthodox family had it's own pros and cons. But being expected to do something which I definitely didn't want to do was the worst thing. My father Kushal Goswami is a teacher in a private school and my mother Taru Goswami is a housewife. And I am their only daughter, Savi Goswami. One day, I couldn't just hold it in myself and just let it out to my dad that maybe I could do something other than being a CA. But of course, he didn't work on my whims. He said in a grave tone, "Mainu, you know we have struggled a lot for you, you are excellent in your studies. So better prepare for your career of becoming a C.A." I felt numb and I never touched this subject after that day.

It was past 6 when my cousins arrived. Naksh and Barkha greeted my parents with pleasant smiles and some 'how are yous'. They freshened up and came into my room. Barkha said," Mainu, don't follow something which is not your cup of tea. Choose a career that gives you satisfaction." I nodded and said, "But baa, I can't disappoint my parents." Barkha said, "Take decisions wisely, Mainu."

Then the subject changed and we were having a conversation about something random when maa calls us for dinner and this time I knew what I wanted to say. I said to Papa, "I want to become a director and that's all. Papa, do you believe me? I shall prove it that its not that difficult."After some waiting weeks Papa gifted me a camera and said, "it's okay." Not every person has the same dreams. I have decided to send you to Mumbai and there you can have the training for acting as well as directing". I said in obvious excitement, "thank you papa for understanding me." I was grateful for Barkha baa and Naksh for pushing me in the right direction.

After a month, I went to Mumbai and took admission in Whistling Woods International Institute of Film, Communication and Creative Arts. Goregaon, Mumbai. I was finally ecstatic after so many years. One week after settling I made two friends, Smita and Akash. They wanted to pursue filmography. I was very excited about my practice. We geared up for our first project that is we had to prepare a short film on the Importance of Security of Women. I was thrilled as I wholeheartedly directed the content and Smita and Akash were responsible for filmography and other important features. After 4 weeks of struggle, we made it and managed to grab attention from our professor. So, Smita and Akash decided to throw a small party and I agreed to go with them to celebrate the victory.

Everything was well and good until I met my senior, Rohan. He helped us with some important editing and filmography effects. But, the problem was something else. One day when we walked towards a cafe he unexpectedly grabbed my waist which made me uncomfortable. I felt disgusted and wanted to throw his grubby hands off my waist. Any woman or girl would have been in my situation would have felt that. I ignored it though and continued to enjoy it with my friends.

A few months later, it was not that simple as I thought and ignored it. Things became more worst when he threw a bad joke about me. Which made me annoyed. Then, when we were appointed for a voluntary purpose in our college, Rohan was also there. I was not okay with his presence. After a few minutes, when a fellow friend my mine called me in the green room, I went but Rohan was following me. When I ran, he ran too. I went to the green room and sexually harassing me. I didn't know what to do. I grabbed a stick which was near and smashed in his neck. I went to Smita and Akash. I was disgusted and blank.

Then I spoke to Smita and she told me to talk to our principal, whenever I felt comfortable. I spoke to the principal, after 3 days and he took legal action against Rohan. I managed myself from being broken because it wasn't my fault. After almost 8 and a half years I did my job as a director. My mom and my dad were very proud of me.