Ohh My Acquaintance!!!!

Cool air cannot calms my heart, even though it playing with my curls

Fine drizzles cannot make my heart fresh even though it giving birth to pearls.

I am in a great desperation without my soul future.

Want my love to get down its selfishness and greedy nature.

Here how the mess get started in my life. Have you ever think beautiful love heaven is turning into a hell without any fights, misunderstanding, and arguments!!!! But I am the one who created this sort of trouble in our lives. Now I am crying, tears are rolling out of my eyes without any traffic. I am in great desperation and feel like ending my life for his wealth. Thinking am I doing right?? Here I am planning for suicide to not be coward and can't face the difficulty. But, I want to end my life for his happiness, his comfort and his wealth.

This is all started two years back. I was a poor teenager who was seeking for a good heart to share my love. But I was a big fool who got cheated by a boy who used me for his entertainment and to spend his free time. Later he just fell in love with my friend and now they are happily living in their love life. This is how my first love story got the worst face. As usual, I was too depressed and took nearly four months to accept the truth. Ohh!!! I forgot to say, I am an introvert and a bit conservative. So, this incident hit me very hard. I had lost all hope in the concept of love and started to continue my life in the field of career building. I started to focus on studies and wanted to be in that limit itself. Felt it would be a better boundary which I can put for myself.

But, a sudden tectonic wave came to me and swept every thought of mine. He is Ashu. We were strangers in first sight, later became an acquaintance, then I became his tiktok watching partner, later on good friends, and finally best friends. I was too close to him that once my ex love had asked whether I am in relation with him!!! But Ashu was always my first priority and I loved him as a Bestie. I always suspect he have a crush and too much interested to know who is she. I had some guesses and even thought she will be the one. But...

One night he gave me a sudden shock. It was really a thunderous night and I didn't find any place to save myself. Because my two year guesses were just my assumption and I was the one girl whom I am searching for. He had revealed I was his crush and he loves me even after knowing every nightmares of mine. I scolded him, cried him, told him, convinced him and did everything to make him understand that I was unfit for him. But that stupid was ignored my words and loved me even hard. His strong love finally achieved its goal, I started to love him unknowingly and one night without my knowledge I conveyed it too. Then the new saga has started in my life and it is a beautiful dreamy world where he is the king of my heart palace.

Now I am missing him. He became busy with his own obligations and unable to spend his time with me. I don't want him to spend his hours again with me as I am satisfied with whatever I got from him. But he is striving hard to gift me a beautiful thing...his time. So I want to die. At least my end can free him the tie of love and he can live freely. I believe love is the mode of freedom. But now I am acting opposite to my wisdom. Even though I am not dared to suicide at least I want a daring life without him. I know without him life just like day without sun, night without moon, and heart without soul. But...I have to check the purity of my love by burning it with the flame of depsaration. I know I can do it. I know I will save my love. And I know I should respect his beautiful heart.