More Than Words To Say

I saw her for the first time among the crowd gathered in the lift of our building. Her hazel eyes held my gaze for a considerable time. To my surprise, those doe-like eyes turned to be abruptly as if responding to the sound of my silent beckoning. I doubted whether there was a hint of smile in them. I stood riveted to her eyes and even forgot to step out when the lift opened at my floor. Luckily, she too lived on the same floor as mine. I came to my senses only when she freed me of the spell cast by her bewitching eyes by pulling her gaze away. Only then did I realize that it was time for me to step out.

The next morning, I sat down in my balcony to enjoy an early morning cup of coffee. My eyes lazily slid through the apartments facing mine. All of a sudden, I held my breath as something caught my eyes. She was there in the balcony right in front of mine. My eyes froze on her, moving synchronously with her every move. She was watering her plants. I called out to her on silence. She promptly turned to me just as she had done the other day in the lift as if she had heard the silent voice of my heart-beats. The world around me stopped as our eyes met and exchanged a thousand words in utter silence. She smiled before she turned away and walked inside her apartment. That was the happiest moment of my life. I knew I was falling for her.

We used to meet each other day-after-day for several months and talk for hours in the language of silence. Words are not necessary for two hearts to convey their cryptic message. We knew that we were in love with each other. It was time for us to finally put our thoughts to words. A voice within me compelled me to propose to her. Every other man would have felt ecstatic at such a crucial moment. But I knew it could mean the end of everything for me. It was not the fear of rejection that had bound my stride. It was because of the fact that fate had denied me the ability to speak. Yes! I was deaf and dumb right from my birth. I was almost sure that no girl would like to marry a man like me. And a girl as beautiful as her would reject me for sure. But still, I decided to try my luck.

I knew that she used to take a stroll in the nearby park every evening. I decided to meet her there and open my heart to her. That evening, she was sitting alone on a bench in the park watching the magnificient display of colours painted on the sky by the setting sun. As I approached her, I called her silently like I usually did. She quickly turned to me and flashed a welcoming smile. I took the hint and sat down on the bench beside her. Without wasting a moment, I gestured with my hands and said, "I love you!"

She smiled and I could see a delicate film of tear gleaming in her eyes. She made a gesture that said, "so do I!"

I was mad with joy but the very next second, my face fell. I was worried as the moment to tell her about my disability had arrived. The thought of losing her forever shook me. But I can't keep her in dark forever. It was 'now-or-never' moment. I took a deep breath and gestured with my hands that I can't speak. Her smile faded and she stared at me in utter disbelief. For a moment, my heart ceased beating as I was now sure that she was about to stomp off. And if she walks out on me, I won't be able to love someone ever again. I kept my anxious eyes locked to hers all the time. In a split second, the agonized hue in her eyes brightened -up with a sparkling smile. She made a gesture with her hands that said, "so can't I !"