LIGHTEN THE BURDEN YOU CARRY; CALLED EGO

      One day I had a fight with my sister over a trivial thing. Our arguments went on escalating, and our voices went on soaring. Mom came to our rescue. She yelled at both of us and said that she did not like the way we behaved. It was more of my fault, and I had spoken too curtly. She asked us to ask pardon to each other. But my ego was so high that I ignored her and walked off. My behavior significantly hurt mom. Probably she had tears too in her eyes, but we did not pay any heed to it. Time passed, and dad came in the evening from his office. It was Sunday the next day. I had a birthday party invitation from my friend. I was enormously eager to attend it.

As dad came back from the office, mom handed over tea to him. Just by her look, dad knew something was wrong. The house was unusually silent. After some time, he asked mom what the matter was? Probably they discussed what had happened. I was in my room with no talking terms with my sister. I was not talking to mom, as usual, just yes or no to her questions. After a while, I went to the hall where both were sitting, sipping their tea, and told them that I was eager to attend my friend’s birthday party and wanted dad to buy a gift for her. Dad agreed and said that the next day, Sunday, he would accompany me to the gift shop and drop me at my friend’s house. I was enthralled. I thanked him and went back to my room, showing the same tantrums to my mom and sister.

The following day, I got up with immense joy and waited for the time to approach. I wore my best dress in the evening and waited for my dad. She came and said that he had little work outside and I could help him. Out of compulsion, I agreed. I applied makeup and wore my best, and waited for him. He came and took me to the gift shop. There he bought my friend a lovely gift. I was happy. He then said, let us go to the grocery shop because mom had asked for a few things. Mom needed to prepare the dinner. So, he asked me to help him buy it and carry it to the house before going to my friend’s place. With a heavy heart, he agreed. We went and bought things. When I lifted it, it was too heavy. But out of shame and respect for my dad, I did not hand it over to him. I was surprised that it was so heavy; I was panting and struggling to lift it. Still, dad did not hire an auto. Though our home was not too far, the weight I lifted made me feel like we stayed on the moon. Each step was difficult. After a few steps, I started sweating profusely. The makeup I wore started smudging. Eyeliner smudged up; the foundation started flowing, making me look like a cartoon. I was excessively worn out after a few steps. I placed all my bags on a bench and sat there breathing heavily.

Dad came up to me, asking what had happened. I looked at him with surprise. Is he not able to see my condition? Is he acting like this to punish me? I looked at him with curious eyes, and he smiled and sat beside me. He handed me the bottle of water which he was holding and asked me to drink. I drank as though I had not drunk water for ages. After I had relaxed a bit, he kept his hand on my lap and started saying, “You know how it is so difficult to carry heavy bags and walk. My child, you cannot walk even a short distance, and you gave up and sat down. The same is life. It is challenging to walk carrying heavy loads of EGO and lead it. You will not be able to lead a happy life. Anger, ego, and ill feelings will hinder your happiness as heavyweight hinder your speed. All your goodness will get washed off like your makeup.”

I looked at him with a grin. He continued further, saying, “We all have a devil hidden in us. No one can escape him. Our goodness suppresses him. He is always in a rush to come out of us and exhibit his character. The challenge in life is to chain him up and keep him repressed. Never allow him to come out and rule over you. Always make him your slave, never be his slave. What you say in the fit of anger will remain in the hearts of the one you hurt permanently. Do not ever regret it later. Rather develop patience and see the result. People will love you. They will respect you for your character.” Saying so, he hired an auto and dumped all the bags in it. We went home. The moment we entered home, I hugged my mom and asked her forgiveness. I hugged my sister with tears in my eyes, promising her never to repeat my mistake ever.

I had learned my lesson. We all have jealous, anger, and ego in us. It is inbuilt in us. It is like the devil caged in us. The actual trial is to keep it chained. Never let it out and rule us. Life will become bliss, and happiness will prevail the moment the tough time passes off. If this devil comes out, it will devour all our joy and peace, leaving behind remorse and regret.