Her First Day

Although this place is years and years old, it still seems new; probably because of people and distempered walls. What I love about this place is that everyone keeps the alley and veranda clean even if their houses are dirty. During day, this place looks like there's about to be some celebration. And during night, it indeed is a celebration.

I keep my room clean. If Ma were here, she'd have been glad to see me following her ethics (or would she not?). Maai has been looking after me for two years after Ma's death. Now that I'm adult, she's decided to put me at work. I've always admired Maai as she never made me feel like an orphan. I remember her fighting for me when Leela Mausi insisted her to put me at work right after Ma's death. She refused as I wasn't adult yet and also, a brand new orphan. She's protected me like her own child. She'd always wanted a child but was unable to have one. She says she's fortunate enough to have me as her goddaughter.

Yesterday, while braiding my hair, she asked me whether I was anxious as it's my first day at work. Yes, I was. She told me that she'd make sure I don't get old men as "they're beasts." She said, she wouldn't be able to do that longer. So, that means, soon or later, I'll have to deal with old men. I asked if she ever wanted to get out of this clean-on-the-outside-and-dingy-on-the-inside place.

"So many times, when I was young." She replied. "I know there'll be a time when you too will feel like it, despite being with me. But the truth is that, there's no other way. Who will accept us? There is a reason we're called 'veshya'. Doesn't it sound similar to the Varna 'Vaishya'?" I nodded.

"Well, it's probably because they're the traders of goods and we're the traders of body. This is our Varna. We come under only one category; no caste, no religion, no discrimination. I wish the world were this lucid." I didn't realize when she'd finished braiding.

"Your mother would've never liked seeing you taking her place. She wanted to educate you properly. But she left you halfway and you didn't want to go anywhere else. This is what you've chosen, Gudiya. This radiance on your skin isn't going to stay forever. This raw skin; it rots with age and by the touch of men. So does this enthusiasm. You'll have to get used to it. And I won't be always there for you. So, you'll have to stand up for yourself. Being in this job doesn't give any man the access to do whatever they want to do to you. You'll always have the choice to say 'No'. Understood?" She smiled. I nodded.

It's my second day at job today. Maai tied a red thread around my wrist saying it'd protect me from evil and planted a kiss on my forehead. I'm left alone in my room, waiting for my customer. Now the only dirty thing in my room is me.