An open letter

Many things are making sense now,

Which never made sense before.

I wish I could go back to that childhood bubble,

When you loved me.

In the process to be enough,

I stopped loving myself.

In the process to put a smile on your face,

I learned to hold onto toxic people.

And always being afraid that if I don’t hold on, people will leave me.

You said you loved me,

You said you sacrificed so much for me,

If I am so special,

Why did I grew up hating myself?

Why did I grew up needing constant validation?

I love you,

But why is loving myself so difficult?