It All Started With A Book
It All Started With A Book6 mins 723 6 mins 723
It was March, 2013, I used to live in Raigarh and he(Abir) lives in Kolkata. Though we met through facebook, he is one of my cousins' friends. About that cousin, we rarely got enough time to visit them. Abir and I became really good friends but only on facebook, we talked a lot about a lot of things, he also told me that he lives somewhere near to my cousin's home. I was very happy knowing that, I started imagining that the next time whenever I will meet my cousin, I will surely meet him as well. And I was praying so hard to meet him when I would visit Kolkata. And God did answer my prayer. Though we visited my cousin rarely this time I got an opportunity to visit him and it was so sudden and unplanned as if God deliberately did that.
I really started liking him and I felt like he did too, and wanted to be in a relationship, but I was too shy to say and there were certain things because of which I thought it was not possible.
When I went to meet my cousin, he only invited Abir telling him that I was there. I was really very excited to meet him, and felt like something will happen.
Finally, Abir came at evening, carrying a book, which I thought he brought for my cousin. But no, he brought that for me. It was “Seven Ancient Wonders" by Matthew Reilly, and it was not a new book that you would just giveaway to someone, it was his own book that he offered me to read it. Now begins the real story. I was really happy to see that he brought something for me, but at the same time I was sad because I could not take the book, as I might never be able to return him.
I said, "I would be so grateful to take this book, but how can I return to you, I may never meet you again in my life." "Why not? If God really wants then we surely will.", he answered. Finally, after some more discussion I accepted it. I was just on seventh heaven at that time, though we were not in a relationship yet, it was just something more than friendship. We then shared our phone numbers.
After few days, I returned to Raigarh, back to my boring life. I always hated to return to Raigarh from Kolkata, but not this time, because now I had some really good memories to take back and cherish until I return to Kolkata. We used to talk on a regular basis, but none of us said those three magical words. I started feeling like he does not love me, so instead of keeping false hopes I must move on, and I did. I began a relationship with a classmate of mine. But I still remember what he said when I told him about my boyfriend, “He must be the luckiest man on the earth”, and I was like “Why don't you want to be the luckiest then” (though I did not tell him that) and I was still hoping for him to say something else but he did not. I swear, I would have broken up with my classmate if he would have told me that he loves me.
After a few days, he began a relationship with someone, that too only online, she was a foreigner, and I also told him that how lucky that girl was. I limited our conversation with him because I felt like the more I will talk to him the more I will feel like I want him.
After a few days, that classmate broke up with me, and it did not even matter, I never loved him. And when I told Abir about it, he started saying nice things again, but not what I wanted to hear. So I was quite upset and when another guy approached me, I accepted his proposal. But I told that guy that I had a crush on someone form Kolkata but he said nothing about it. Time passed by, but I could not just forget Abir, and I knew that somewhere he also still liked me.
Meanwhile, I heard that Abir broke up with that foreigner, I was really happy too, but here I was with someone else. After a few days, this guy also broke up with me by blaming me that I love that friend of mine from Kolkata. I told him that I did not love anyone else but he did not believe. Finally, he broke up and after two days I even forgot about him. I told Abir about it and he seemed happy about too, but still nothing that I wanted to hear. So I left all hopes about him and also thought that flirting is better than being in a relationship and so I just flirted with random people. But I was not happy, obviously. I was also not approaching him thinking that he might just consider me only a friend and nothing else, and that long distance might not work out, etc, etc.
After a few days, I went to Kolkata, and while returning home, when I was sitting on a train, I opened my facebook. My life was not going very well because of thousands of reasons, but I saw that Abir was online, and something about it just put a smile on my face, gave me a ray of hope. I texted him, and while conversing I told him I was returning from Kolkata, and he asked me why did I not meet him, I told him it was not possible and so on. I perfectly remember the date, 4th May, 2014.
I pledged this time that I will tell him about my feelings, irrespective of the results. So I was preparing myself for that. Finally, on 7th May, just three days later, we randomly started chatting, and I asked him whether he has a girlfriend presently. He said no, but he liked someone. He asked me the same question and I gave him the same answer. I had a feeling that he liked me only, my heart was racing, but I could not say anything because I was afraid if it was not me. So I asked him to tell me who she was, he hesitated. And after asking him for thousand times he, finally, texted, “Go and look into the mirror” and I was like oh my God, I could not believe my eyes, did I just read this, have I read correctly, I literally read it several times to believe it. I even looked at the mirror, as if really thinking a different face might pop up. But yes it was me and my face and only me. God I did not know what to tell him. I told him that I was waiting for this since an year.
So, that's how we started our journey together, and when I could finally meet him again he said, “I told you that if God wanted us to meet, he surely will let us meet” and I never returned that book. It's a memento of our love.
Another great thing happened too. I wanted to study in Gujarat, but my dad forced me to study in Kolkata. I was upset in the beginning but then I realised it is God's plan, it always was, it always will be. “God gives you what you need, not what you want”. It's four years now and we are looking forward to getting married. And I truly believe what Rumi said, “Lovers don't finally meet somewhere, they are in each other all along.”