Why do fights occur between couple ?

A marriage is supposed to be a pious and sacred relationship between two beautiful people.

Everyday people from far-off places used to come to listen to Satsang performed by Saint Kabir. One day after Satsang was over, a man kept straddling, when everyone left. He went to Saint Kabir and said, “I have to ask you something. I am a householder and I always get in a feud with my family members, especially my wife. I want to know, why I have so much distress at home and how it can be resolved.

Saint Kabir kept quiet for a while and then called his wife and said, “bring me a lighted lantern.”

Saint Kabir’s wife went and brought back a lighted lantern. The man was surprised to see this and thought to himself, “Why did Saint Kabir ask for a lighted lantern during the daytime.”

After a while, Saint Kabir again called his wife and said, “Listen, bring me some sweets.”

This time instead of something sweet, his wife came back with some snacks and gave them to Saint Kabir.

Seeing this man thought, “It is probably the house of lunatics. Salted snacks instead of sweets and lantern in the daytime.”

Then with a disappointed look on his face man said, “Kabir Ji. I am leaving.”

Saint Kabir asked, “Is your dilemma deciphered now? Or is there anything more you need to ask?”

The man replied, “Solution! What kind of solution is this? I couldn’t understand.”

Saint Kabir said, “When I asked for a lighted lantern, my wife could have indicated "Are you crazy? Why do you need a lantern on such an afternoon?"

But she thought I might need it for some work, so she brought it without saying anything.

When I asked for sweets, she brought back snacks. Maybe there were no sweets in the house, so she brought snacks. That’s what I thought and didn’t say anything.”

Saint Kabir continued, “What’s there to dispute about it. When we avoid fighting and trust each other, we can safeguard ourselves from getting into an unnecessary quarrel.”

The man understood that Saint Kabir did this to show him the consequences of his problem.

Then Saint Kabir said, “In household life, equilibrium is maintained by trusting each other. If the husband makes a mistake.. the woman takes care of it and if there

is a blunder with the woman, then the husband tolerates it. That’s the basic mantra of success in our family life.”

Why do we fight at home? The rationale is our ego and deprivation of reciprocal trust. Husband and wife are complementary to each other. That's why if one makes mistakes then others should act wisely, keep composure, and try to solve the problem with love, not with anger. In household life, one’s shortcomings should be given less attention and trust should be given more importance.