US - A Journey Back Home

A cold windy morning. Starbucks, at my place, never saw such a huge line. The shopkeeper looked quite happy, as the billing machine made his work a lot easier, but the employees were forcing too hard on themselves to fake a smile.

Pari, who was serving coffee for my line, looked dizzy and surprised. I never thought of a Green Starbucks apron look so PERFECT on someone.

Pari is an Indian and is named after a fairy as I'VE LEARNED. I always wanted to take her out and hang out with her if possible.

I stood in this huge line, literally noticed by everybody but not the ONE I wanted to be noticed by. I blame the TALLER ONE standing right in front of me and covering my beautiful view. He was smiling. I liked that as most of the people are irked, given the windy climate. I thought even if this guy would ask her out, Pari might use an apt phrase for him. "GET IN LINE".

I am Leo. My friend calls me Smarty but most people call me Shorty. My parents died when I was a kid. I was poor and born as a DWARF. I lived in a shelter home for 15 years. Now, I'm into college. I live alone in an apartment. All I have for myself is a picture of Jesus passed over to me from my mother.

I always wanted MY PEOPLE with whom I can talk, laugh and cry my heart out. The doors of me finding them are always closed, pointing me to the only room that's open. So, waking up, getting gazed and bullied everywhere I go, coming back to the only open door for me, my apartment and talking to my friend is my daily routine. I never regretted my life. I firmly believed that life goes on as written. The only person whom I can blame is the one who wrote such a tragic story for me. GOD.

But, I can't blame him because he is my ONLY FRIEND. So, I accepted and moved on.

As I was approaching Pari, my heart started to pace that day. She looked stunning that morning. I asked God to help me make some courage to ask her out. She looked busy fetching coffee, packing it, calling next and repeating the same. All I understood was that she was busy faking it. Life.

I felt nervous as I approached her closer. She called next. I was standing right in front of her. She smiled at me. I felt as if she has a genuine smile for me. I smiled at her back.

Pari asked "Good Morning, What can I get for you?"

I said "Hi Pari".

She looked dazzled as never before did a customer call her by her name. Even the TALL BROWN PERSON, standing beside and waiting for his coffee, looked at me insecurely. I haven't thought much about it at that point in time.

I added "Mai…. Aapko… Bahut… Pasand… Karta... Hu. Kya aap…mere…saath... date

pe…chaloge"!! "

It took me 2 days to practice that.

Pari and THE TALLER ONE were looking at each other, smiling. I didn't get it in the first place, but

later she told me "You are so sweet, but I am engaged". I saw them both having the same rings.

I felt broken and devastated. "Hell to my sweetness," I thought to myself.

I returned to my apartment. The neighbor downstairs tried to push me again but not today. I forced my fist right into his lower jaw. He looked fucked up. I loved it. I never felt this part inside me.

I slammed my apartment door and went straight to my friend. I wanted to feel that shimmering ray of light coming out of his celestial hands in that picture. I want him to console me.

All of a sudden, the power went off. My anger was pushed. My belief was pushed. I was pushed.

I lit a candle and placed it in front of my friend. I started to speak to him.

I asked him "why me?"

I got no answer. But this time, I did not accept that. I forced him to talk to me but of no use. I felt lost. I got to the window in despair. I opened it.

A heavy breeze started to flow inside.

The candle lit a fire as the wind toppled the candle down on to my friend's picture. He was burning down. As I approached him, the picture was burnt to pieces.

I was crying and shouting at myself.

As I was putting the pieces together, with my tears rolling all over the floor, I observed a tear drop stopping a tiny RED flame on the picture.

I took it out. As I observed it, I saw a date.

As I saw the picture closely, I found a date and a place.

I was surprised.

A LEAD ABOUT MY PEOPLE?

The power came back on.

A SIGN FROM MY FRIEND!!

He was burned to flames, but he led me forward. I wanted to look at him one last time, hold him and say goodbye.

But I can't.

I lost my ONLY friend.

I took his remains and left to meet my people. I traveled on a boat and a locomotive to reach the place.

Placed right in between the hilly slopes of Himalayas, on the shore of river Brahmaputra, I found MY place magical. Most people are short like me.

I found my ancestors' house and learnt a lot about them. People said that my ancestors are a true inspiration for people over there for generations. It made me so proud. I never felt that before.

A few days later, people started to know me well. I see no pity or angry eyes on me. As I was wandering down the streets, I saw a café.

I went inside. I saw a beautiful girl looking at me. She felt shy and I liked that. As I approached her, she looked pretty nervous.

I asked "Hi. My name is Leo. What's your name? "

She said "PARI".