Therapy with the Universe

Woke up with dark circles beneath my eyes, dried-up tears still leaving behind the stains, looking in the mirror beside me I said, 'i won't cry again', but my eyes betrayed me, the warm water flooding my face, I didn't stop them or in better words, I couldn't stop them, so I just let them flow. The worst feeling being I didn't know the reason for my breakdown, I didn't know the reason behind my outburst of emotions. But nevertheless, I started my day, by pretending to ignore anything that happened this morning. Well, actually I have been used to it, since pretending to ignore is what I have been doing for so long and so many mornings continuously.

I have learned to be a good actor, smiling a fake but convincing smile has been my routine for now. Met so many people, but nobody seems dear ones, even amidst family I started feeling lonely.

Today, once again in the nighttime, I go into my room, and silently sit in the corner never bothering to turn on the lights, but seems like my mind had some other plans.

Almost involuntarily I opened the door to the rooftop and stood there, I just stood there and gazed at the sky,

Advertisement

so very dark, with no moonlight but those thousand stars shined, at me, I felt.

I felt calm after such a long time as if every star trying to convince me, 'It's going to be alright.' 

I found it comforting. The silence, the darkness, the loneliness, nothing bothered me at this moment.

From fearing the dark to finding peace in the same darkness, here I stand. Feeling alive after such a long time, felt myself, today I felt like someone more than just a random girl, I felt like someone important, like someone cared for, I felt as if the universe cared, I felt as if the universe wants to bring me back, I felt like the universe wanted me to stay.

I went back to my life, but my theory with the Universe still continued, and sometimes I did fake my smile, but those times were outnumbered by the times I was genuinely happy.

I surrendered myself to the universe and regained myself.

The therapy increased and so did my happiness, I no longer stayed the gloomy girl I used to be.

No longer craved for silence, no longer stayed in loneliness, but rather stayed alive in the darkest sky!!!