The Voice Of The Demon

Abir's eyes started to itch. He had not slept well last night. The alarm clock had woken him up and he dragged himself out of his cozy bed but he was not fully awake. On top of that, his eyes had started to itch and water. He splashed cold water on his face and that seemed to wake him up. He looked up at his reflection in the mirror and found himself looking at a man with a protruding paunch and a flabby face, fat cheeks and a double chin threatening to develop. He grimaced at his sight. There were insomnia marks under his eyes and the tiredness seeped out of his face. He stepped away from the mirror and went in search for the towel. He could not find it in its usual place and so he cursed Nandita under his lips. Even after 15 years of their marriage, he still found faults with her way of managing household. He found her asleep beatifically with nary a care. He gazed malevolently at her for some moments. He wanted to shake her violently and make her wake up but he knew that if he dared to do so, he would get slapped and pummelled into submission for Nandita had a fiery temper and if roused to a fight, she would not back down. He gnashed his teeth and then went looking for his towel in his cupboard. The towel was not there either. He finally found it thrown on a chair in the living room. He wiped his face and then went to the kitchen to make tea. Nandita hated waking up in the morning and Abir had to wake up early to get ready for the office in time. They had worked up a compromise. Abir would wake up, prepare his tea and read paper and he would let Nandita sleep till the time he got up for his shower. Nandita would wake up then and conjure up some breakfast for him. He would eat whatever was put on his plate without complaining and then leave for the office. Nandita would then start with her day. She was a housewife but she always introduced herself as a homemaker. Both of them had quick tempers and in the first year of their marriage, they had fought bitterly over trivial things. Abir wanted to divorce her but his father had warned him that if Abir would break his marriage, he would have to break his relationship with his parents too. Abir's father, Nathulal, was the head of the family and he always had his own way. Nandita was the child of Nathulal's closest friend and he wanted to keep Nandita happy. Abir had finally given up and taken up the role of a docile, hen-pecked husband. Nandita ruled over their household with impunity. Only once had Abir slapped her and then had got the beating of his life. That violent event had been the watershed of their married life. Ever since that day, their married life had progressed smoothly. There had been certain moments when Abir had been cantankerous but she knew now how to handle him. A slap now and then had kept him in line.

While Abir was looking around for his towel, Nandita had been dreaming that she was lost in a forest. It was not a nice dream for Abir had been around but she was loathe to call out to him. It was almost as if she was hiding from Abir and that made her mad. Even in the dreamy state, she was not going to let Abir boss her around. She was quite fit for her age and with proper make up she even passed on as a pretty housewife. She was boisterous and was able to impress people around her with her confidence and highly infectious laughter. Her outgoing nature was completely in contrast to Abir who was more of an introvert. Abir's great weekend would be when he would be able to immerse himself in a book and then stop interacting with other people around him. Nandita's great weekend would be to assemble her friends in the house and have a roaring tea and snacks party. She believed life meant noise and celebration. He wanted his life to be a silent dream. She loved children and wanted at least 3 of their own. He hated kids and didn't want even one. In the end, they agreed to at least have one child of their own. Danny was born 8 years ago but he had died of SIDS 2 months later. His death had traumatized Nandita and she had to spend the next 6 months with her family, allowing her time to come to terms with her grief. Needless to say, those 6 months had been the best days of Abir's married life. The sudden and terrifying death of Danny caused Nandita such mental trauma that she could never convince herself to become a mother again. Her decision was warmly accepted by Abir and ever since that day, they had lived for themselves. Abir had worked hard in his office, earning accolades and saving good amount of money. Nandita had splurged on herself and enjoyed herself immensely. Abir had hated her for her profligate ways but lacked guts to confront her. Still he seethed inside and sometimes plotted to make her pay for making his life so demeaning.

Nandita heard Abir move around in the kitchen and she got a sudden hankering for a cup of tea. She got up in a jiffy.

“Hey Abir! Add one cup for me too.”

Her shrill cry was loud enough to travel to the apartments around them. Abir was indignant. He wondered why she could not come to the kitchen and talk to him in a normal tone.

“Did you listen to what I just now said?” She roared.

“Yes, I did.” Abir tried to keep his voice normal but he knew he sounded irritated. Soon he heard her walking towards him, thumping her feet on the floor. His heart started racing. He didn't want to get into a scrap early in the morning. His throat suddenly felt parched. He turned around to pick a bottle. He could feel her standing behind him, rage building inside her. He took a gulp of water straight from the bottle but did not turn around to face his tormentor. Nandita waited for a couple of seconds for the coward to turn around and face her but from his slouched posture she knew that there was no longer any fight remaining in him. She grimaced and strolled outside the kitchen. Abir's face was flushed but he was glad that the day had not started with a stinging slap on his face.

Soon the tea was ready and Abir carried the cups to the living room. Nandita had turned on the TV and a channel was blaring latest music. It was loud with crass lyrics. Nandita hummed along with it. Abir finished his cup quickly, scalding his tongue and then he ran to take his shower. He had to get away before Nandita could say or do anything to completely destroy his day. He turned on the shower and let the cold jets hit his body. Then he heard a very clear voice in his left ear.

“Surely I can help you.”

He heard it only in his left ear. He was flabbergasted. On top of that, something was definitely wrong with the voice. It sounded disembodied, as if emanating from a hollow place. The tone of the voice was also very neutral. He jerked his head left but there was no one in the bathroom. He was all alone though for some reason he was suddenly very conscious of his nakedness. He waited for some moments but he heard nothing more so he concentrated on his shower. By the time he was dressed up, he found that Nandita had placed cornflakes and milk on the table. That was all she was going to do for him that morning. He did not complain, quickly finished his meal and then got out of the house. He did not even turn around to look at Nandita for he knew she was going to ignore him.

It took him 30 minutes of drive to reach his office. He kept the radio volume at its lowest and focused on his breathing. By the time he parked his car, he was ready for the office work. He walked in with a pleasant smile on his face and headed to his cubicle. Samantha, his colleague, gave him a warm smile. She was five years junior to him and reported directly to him. On the current project, Abir and Samantha were the only ones working. Even though they were supposed to develop apps for a new client, the deadlines were not stringent and the work load was manageable. Abir ensured that Samantha did not get overwhelmed, a fact that Samantha appreciated.

The day went by peacefully. Some old bugs were fixed and a release made for the testing team. Towards the evening, Abir started to feel very tired. There was still one hour to go by the clock. Abir decided to take a coffee break. He did not notice that the moment he left his seat, Samantha left her seat too and followed him to the pantry. She saw Abir stretching himself and suppressed a smile. She did not like fat, lazy slobs and it was quiet clear to her that Abir never exercised. She had even seen him breathless after climbing one flight of stairs. She, on the other hand, was quite athletic and loved to play tennis. Even though she disliked Abir's look and his flabby body, she was not a moron to express her displeasure to him. She had seen how hungrily he used to look at her. She had heard rumours of an unhappy marriage and she knew that she had to make her moves now so that Abir would start dancing to her tunes. He was after all her team leader and if he were happy, it would do wonders to her career. Although she flirted with him and made salacious jokes that made him laugh, she knew that she could not take it all the way. She knew that she would never be able to kiss that podgy face. All that mattered to her was to ensure that Abir would keep recommending her to stay on the project. The work load was quite less and she used to get out of the office by 6 PM. That was a pleasant change from her previous project where the work was always hectic and she was all the time going out of the office to only crash in her bed. Even though Abir let her go at 6 PM, he used to stay late. Everyone knew that he hated going back to his house.

“Hey,” She called. Abir immediately became self conscious. He used to think that Samantha liked him and it always made him feel nervous in front of her. He wanted to impress her, to make her long for him. For the past two months or so, he had been thinking a lot about her. He wanted to share all his troubles with her. He wanted to hold her, to put his head on her shoulders and blurt out everything that was bothering him.

“Hey yourself.” He tried to pull his tummy in.

“Did you hear the latest rumour?” Samantha started to whisper. She knew Abir loved it for she had to step closer to him to whisper. Abhir raised his left eyebrow.

“About cost cutting. Every department has been told to fire at least 2 people.”

“Ooh, that's bad,” Abir puffed up his cheeks. It was his way of indicating to people around him that he was thinking.

“Be honest with me,” Samantha put on her cute act. “Do you think my time is up?”

Abir sucked the air in. He shook his head.

“Come on. We are the only ones working on this project. If you are gone, who will do the work?”

“I don't think they care about such mundane things.”

Abir knew that the senior management really did not care much about junior employees. If they had decided to let Samantha go then there was nothing Abir could do about it. He would be promised a new colleague and within a week the HR would send some new employee to him. Then they would be done. Abir would have to teach the new colleague and still strive to meet the deadlines. He sighed.

“I am sure Mirza sir would have contacted me about it,” He said.

“Well, then, please let me know if you hear of anything about me.” She smiled wistfully at him.

“Now, let's not talk about things that are not gonna happen.”

She grabbed a styrofoam cup and filled it with coffee from the coffee machine that sat in the corner. She hated the taste of the coffee from the machine but she could not let Abir know that she came over to just talk to him. She had to keep up the appearances that she had meant to get coffee and not come to speak with him. She could feel his eyes on her and felt disgusted. When she turned around, she managed to smile at him and then almost sprinted out of the pantry. Abir wanted to reassure her that he would not let anything bad happen to her but she ran away and so feeling a bit disgruntled he decided to take his coffee to his seat.

“She is only using you, you know that, right?”

The same disembodied voice spoke in his left ear again. He gave a start and spilled some coffee on the floor. He glanced towards his left but there was no one over there.

“Who? Who are you?” He managed to squeak but no one responded. He was spooked badly and scampered to his cubicle. He knew that when one started to hear voices, it was time to pay a visit to a psychiatrist but he knew he could not do so. If anyone were to learn about his mental troubles, his career would be over. He would be kicked out without mercy. People who hear voices were going mad and the stigma of being branded an insane person would destroy his promising career. He shook his head and decided to pour himself into his work.

---------------------

Nandita played with Mrinal's hair. She had oiled and combed his hair. Mrinal was younger than her. She liked to belived that she was still 25 years old though she was approaching 36. Mrinal was a college going student, the only son of their neighbour. He was not even 22 years of age. He was not good at studies and had no ambitions except to go around and seduce housewives. He was in his final year of graduation and his father was putting pressure on him to start appearing for job interviews but Mrinal wanted to enjoy his life for some more time and he was very keen to apply for master's degree. He was studying for BA in History and all that he had managed to learn was the names of right guide books that allowed him to pass exams. He loved spending time in gym and had bulked up his body. Their love affair had been cheesy, to say the least. A brawny guy running after a coy maiden managed to convince her of his undying love. Nandita knew that it was only a time pass affair and expected nothing from Mrinal though she kept showering him with gifts so that he would stay loyal to her. So far her generosity had managed to keep Mrinal hooked.

“Time for you to go home,” She whispered in his ear. Mrinal was engrossed in the game on his phone and grumbled.

“Abir will be here soon.” She bit his ears playfully. He pushed her away and stood up.

“Even if he sees me here, he would not say anything.” He flexed his muscles. “One punch from me should be more than enough.”

“I know but leave now.” She had to push him out. Mrinal swaggered towards the stairs. Nandita noticed that the old lady who lived in the apartment diagonal to her was once again peeking at them from behind her grilled door. Nandita knew that many people in the apartment complex knew about her affair but she didn't care. Abir had managed to alienate everyone in the apartment complex with his penchant for avoiding social functions. Still Nandita knew that it was time for her to move. Time spent with Mrinal had been refreshing but it was time now to move cities and start afresh. She would have to push Abir to get a new job and she decided to have a talk that evening itself. She knew that people like Mrinal would not leave her alone so easily. If she tried to break it off, Mrinal would make her life horrible. She had to disappear from this city. That was the only way one could get rid of people like Mrinal.

After some 30 minutes, the door bell rang and she admitted Abir in the house. He looked tired. His eyes were puffy but he also looked scared.

“What happened?” She inquired but Abir just shook his head and walked inside past her. She shrugged and proceeded towards the kitchen to get the dinner ready. She was busy with the pots and pans for a while and then she started feeling uneasy. She stopped for a moment and realized that her unease was due to the fact that Abir had not started TV. She checked on him and found him to be seated in a slouched position with his chin resting on his chest.

“Are you all right?” She demanded. Abir glanced at her once but then went back to staring at the floor. Nandita pursed her lips and went back to the kitchen. After some time, Abir dragged himself to the bathroom to do his evening ablutions. He had washed his face but it was quite clear that he had been crying.

“Sissy,” She thought. “He is just a big sissy. Crying at the drop of a hat. No good fellow.”

She however chose to not argue over it. She wanted to enjoy her dinner in peace. Abir shared the same sentiments. The dinner was a silent affair. Abir went to his room and lay on his bed. Nandita decided to ignore him and started watching TV.

Abir was terrified but he could not share anything with Nandita. The voice had spoken to him again on his drive home. It repeated “I can help” thrice and every time those words echoed in his left ear, he had let go of the steering wheel. The voice had been insistent and Abir felt the increase in intensity. The speaker whosoever it was was getting upset at being ignored.

“What if it were all figments of my imagination?” Abir wondered. “What if I am going insane? What if there is no voice?”

“But I am right here!”

Abir gave a suppressed yelp and jumped out of the bed. The voice had been too close to him. It seemed as if the speaker were just above him, hovering over him. There was no one in the room. The door was closed. There was no other sound except for the whirring of the fan and the sound of TV that came from the living room.

“What are you scared of?”

This time the voice seemed to come from his chest. Abir looked thunder struck.

“Well, I am all around you.”

“Who, who?” Abir could not even complete his question.

“Lie down on your bed.” The voice commanded. The tone had changed subtly from non-threatening to a positively intimidating one. Abir meekly complied. As soon as he lay down, the door was flung open by Nandita. Abir had closed his eyes and kept it that way. Nandita closed the door a bit and then marched back to her movie.

“Good,” The voice seemed to come from right atop him. “Follow my advice and I will soon help you in getting rid of her. Moreover I will help you in making your life great.”

“Who are you?” Abir thought.

“Good, good.” The voice encouraged him. “To speak with me, you don't have to actually speak. Think and I will hear you.”

“But...”

“Yeah, right. I have not introduced myself. See, long time back, I used to have a name but then I have forgotten it now. People have kept giving me various labels and for some reason every time I accept a label, I start displaying traits of that label. Do you understand?”

“No.”

“Say, if you think of me as a kind, old man, I will start behaving like a kind, old man. If you think of me as a poltergeist, I will start behaving like it. Now, do you understand?”

“So then what are you? A ghost?”

“Well, do you want me to appear and behave like a ghost? I don't think you will be courageous enough to look at me then.”

“You, you are scaring me.”

“All your life, you have been scared. And look where that has landed you. If you were not scared of your father's anger, you would not have that virago out there. If you were not scared of her anger, you would not have suffered so much. Oh my child, I have seen you cry so many times, I could no longer bear your tears. Oh my son, every time you cry, I cry along with you. And you have suffered so much. You have been lonely for so long. Bereft of a kind touch, you have blundered through life in a haze of pain and suffering. Don't worry, child. I have finally decided to intervene. I am here now. I will help you, come what may.”

The kind words and the benevolent tone were too much for Abir. He started to cry softly.

“I will help you, dear child. I will help you. Just accept my help.”

“I want you to help me.” Abir thought.

“Thank you, thank you. Now sleep. I will soon speak with you.”

Abir fell asleep immediately. When he woke up, it was 3 AM. He felt refreshed. His sleep had not been disturbed at all. After a long time, he had been able to sleep for 5 hours at a stretch. He tried to go back to sleep but then he recalled his amazing conversation with the invisible speaker and wondered if he really had allowed someone divine to intervene in his affairs.

“Well, first you keep me invisible and now you want me to be divine also. Make up your mind, boy.”

Abir gave a start and sat up. The voice had no longer felt like it was coming from a hollow.

“Think of any shape you want me to be.”

Abir closed his eyes and for no reason he thought of his grandfather. When he opened his eyes, he stared at the apparition of his grandfather, smiling benevolently at him.

“Dadu...”

“Dadu it is then.” The apparition smiled. It was not how his grandpa used to smile though. Abir felt a thrill run up his spine.

“Oops.” The apparition stopped smiling. “Now that I have an appearance and a label, I feel much better interacting with you. However keep in mind always that I am not this man. I don't have his memories or his experience. As long as you understand that, we will go along swimmingly well. Now, first thing first. I have no control over your thoughts or your behaviour and consequently on your actions. I don't want to control them. You are very much capable of handling them. All that I can do is help you in making up your mind. I will give a suggestion here and there, probably point you towards a path. Maybe even nudge you to take a course of action. However you and only you will have to bear the consequences of those choices. Under no condition, you will blame me. I don't care if your plan fails or if you are unable to get what you want. Do you understand?”

Abir nodded.

“Good. Now don't be upset. I have to make the terms clear. Many times I have been blamed for unforeseen outcomes and I take umbrage at being blamed for a man's plight. Be assured though. Soon you will be in a better state. You will get the confidence to start living your life on your terms. Now we must start with this horrible woman who does not care about you at all. Pack your things. Write a letter that you are leaving the house. For good.”

Abir suddenly had a vision of Nandita raging and cussing him. He shuddered involuntarily.

“There, there. That's why you have to get away from her. It is your money that she is squandering and she treats you like a servant. From today, she will start learning some valuable lessons. Get up now. Understand this. Do not get cowed down by her. Don't worry at all. I am here, right beside you.”

Abir pondered over the suggestion of leaving the house for a moment. There was nothing that bound him to the house or to his wife. He suddenly felt the great need to escape. He got up, packed a valise with his clothes and then sat down to write a note. He had to try 3 times but finally he got the letter right.

“Nandita, I am leaving you. I will file the divorce papers soon. Sign them quickly and we will both be rid of each other. I will pay the rent for the next month but after that you are on your own. Good bye.”

When he walked out of the house, he felt euphoric. He noticed that an old lady was looking at him from behind the grilled door of her apartment that was diagonal to the one he was vacating. He smiled at her and she waved at him. Then she gave him a thumbs up sign. It made Abir smile. He legged it down the stairs and got his car out. The guard was sleeping in his cabin and he had to honk twice but he didn't feel irritated. The euphoria had not yet died. He felt alive and happy. He drove to his office and carried a change of clothes to his cubicle. He changed his clothes in the bathroom and freshened up a bit. When he walked back to his desk, he sported a huge smile on his face.

Nandita had woken up by then and read the letter left by Abir. For some moments, she sat stupefied, wondering as to how Abir was able to muster up courage to take such a huge step. She knew that she had broken Abir's resolve to live with dignity. The coward could not even meet her gaze.

“That spineless cretin,” She wondered aloud. “How could he? Did someone help him? A colleague?”

She thought for a bit and then called Abir's father. Nathulal was enjoying his constitutional with his friend when he got the most upsetting news. He could not believe his ears so he made Nandita repeat it twice.

“That moron,” He bristled. “I will fix this problem. Don't you worry, beta!”

He disconnected the call and quickly called Abir who was staring at a message on his screen. The message was from Mirza, his boss. It was long winded but its purport was that their department had to abide by the directives set by the senior management and that it was time for Samantha to leave. He was about to confront Mirza about the deadlines when his phone rang. He used to dread his father's call but not any more. He let the phone ring for some time, knowing fully well that it would irritate his father. After five minutes of staring at his phone, Abir finally took the call.

“Where the hell are you?” His father screamed.

“What do you want?”

The reply was unexpected but the icy tone that Abir used to answer made Nathulal's skin crawl.

“I asked, where are you?”

“And I asked, what do you want?”

Nathulal screamed a bunch of invectives, hoping to intimidate Abir.

“Disconnect the call.” The apparition that had taken his grandpa's form suddenly spoke in his right ear. Abir hesitated for a moment but then he disconnected the call.

“Good. Now ignore him for the day. Talk to him in the evening.”

Abir blocked his father's number and then went to speak with Mirza. He found his boss outside the office, smoking and staring in the open space contentedly. He was shorter than Abir but he was leaner and fitter and was always dressed impeccably.

“Sir, about that email, I have some concerns.” Abir approached him.

“Sorry, Abir,” Mirza faked a smile. “But I can't help you there.”

“But the deadline to release a client is next week.”

“And I know you can handle it. Almost all the bug fixes that we agreed to release are done and the testing team is testing them.”

“But she is doing a good job.”

“No, she isn't.” Mirza patted Abir's back. “I have checked the bug fixes done. She has fixed only 3 and all of them were minor issues. Come on, Abir. Stop pulling dead weight. She is not a good fit for us.”

“You are wrong, sir.” Abir shook his head. “I have seen her skills develop from close quarters. She might not be fixing many bugs right now but she has got the skills and temperament to take over the project one day.”

Mirza stared at Abir as if he thought Abir had taken leave of his senses.

“I see,” He finally decided to not challenge Abir. “But we have already decided on it. She will leave.”

“Oh no. She won't.” Abir roared. “I will resign then.”

Mirza snickered. That made Abir hopping mad.

“You think I can't?”

Before Mirza could react, Abir heard the apparition's voice in his left ear. “No, you won't.”

“Shut up!” He snapped at the voice.

“What?” Mirza was shocked at the change in Abir's tone.

“What?” Abir looked at him in total confusion.

“Listen, Abir.” Mirza sighed. “I could understand your over the top reaction if Samantha were a great worker but it is not so. The junior colleagues show great promise when you work with them but the moment we move them to some other project they wither away. You have a habit of masking their failures. You are a great coder but you are not a good team leader. You tend to protect them. You teach them what they need to learn to fix easy-peasy bugs. But you don't let them make mistakes. You completely overwhelm them. Do not make this an ego trip. I will pretend that this conversation never happened.”

“Say thanks, you moron.” The apparition hissed in his ears.

Abir mumbled thanks and dragged his feet to his cubicle. He noticed Samantha looking at him. She looked sad. He knew that she wanted him to stand up for her but he was confused. Why did the apparition want Samantha to be gone? Even yesterday, the apparition had mentioned that Samantha was just using him. He wondered if it were true. He thought about what Mirza had spoken about his team leading skills. He was lost in thoughts when he noticed a shadow on his monitor. He glanced up and saw Samantha standing next to him.

The apparition's voice came quite clear to him. “Do not stand up. Do not entertain her.”

“Can I speak with you for a moment?” Samantha asked. Her eyes looked red and puffy. No one liked to get fired.

“Nooooooooooooooo” The apparition sang.

“Sorry, I am busy right now.” Abir managed to keep a straight face.

“Yessssssssssssssss” The apparition seemed happy now.

Samantha was surprised and looked hurt. She could only nod and then she sped away. Abir sighed and turned to look at his monitor. He felt his heart break into a million pieces.

“Write that down.” The apparition spoke. “That's a good line. Ha! A million pieces! That's rich.”

“What do you want?” He snapped. He realized immediately that everyone around him was looking at him. He sighed and opened a notepad.

“Are you really going to write that down?” The apparition was clearly enjoying himself. Abir ignored him.

“Oh, come on. That was a good line. But you don't have to be upset with me.”

“Let me work.”

“Fine. I'll shut up for now.”

The apparition stayed true to his word. It did not disturb Abir for the rest of the day. Abir fixed some bugs and went to a meeting with Mirza and the testing team. He realized soon that he really did not need Samantha in his team, that he was capable of helming the project on his own. When his father could not get through to him, he used his mother's phone to call him but he blocked that number too. When Nandita tried to call him, he blocked her number too.

When it was 6 PM, everyone left for the day. Abir was thinking of sitting in the office but then the apparition suddenly spoke to him.

“You need a place to live, beta.” It cooed. “For now, go to a lodge.”

“A lodge? Why not a hotel?”

“Well, a hotel then. How can I know whether you want to stay in a lodge or in a 5 star hotel?”

“Never said anything about 5 star.”

“Ok. I get it. I get it.”

Abir knew of a hotel nearby. It took him 15 minutes to reach the hotel and another 20 minutes to finish his booking. The room was dingy and he had to make the hotel staff change the bed sheets. He made himself comfortable and then sat on the bed cross-legged.

“Now tell me, what do I do?” He asked the apparition.

“I want you to go to your house once.”

“What for?” Abir was confounded. He didn't want to return to the hell hole he was so happy leaving behind.

“I don't want you to return. I just want you to check on your wife. Let us see how she is handling he crisis.”

“No, seriously, I don't want to go. She might be having one of those kitty parties she hosts all the time.”

“Or may be she is meeting her lover.”

“Her lover?”

“I mean, she could have a lover, right? You have not even touched her for the past six months or so, right? She used to force you earlier but now she does not even care. Ever thought about it?”

Abir shook his head. He was glad that Nandita used to ignore him but he never ever entertained any thought about her taking on a lover. However the more he thought about it, the more doubts he started to have.

“Do you want to check it out?” The apparition hissed. “Or do you want to ignore?”

Abir thought for a bit and then got up.

“Good. Good. Now carry a weapon.”

“A weapon?” Abir had never fought with anyone. He had never wielded a knife.

“Yes. For your safety. You don't have to use it. Sometimes the sight of a knife or a chopper scares the other person.”

Abir agreed with the apparition's logic and raided the hotel's kitchen for a chopper. He wrapped it in a pillow cover and went to his car. For some reason, ever since he had picked up the chopper, he could not think of anything. A deliberate calm pervaded him. He drove the car almost in a trance and parked his car near a supermarket. He then walked towards the apartment complex with giant strides.

One of the guards stationed at the gate noticed him but didn't stop him. Abir took the lift to his apartment and instead of knocking he used his set of keys to open the door. He closed the door gently and listened. He heard giggles coming from the bedroom. He could hear Nandita laughing and then he heard a man's voice. For a moment, his world went dark. Then he forced his eyes open.

“Moment of truth, my son.” The apparition spoke gently. “Do you want to confront them? Or...”

It did not have to complete the sentence. Abir knew what the trailing “or” meant for him. It implied that he was a coward who could do nothing to his adulterous wife or to the idiot who stole his wife. It implied that he was a coward who watched his wife destroy his life and who could do nothing. It implied that he was just a slob who deserved to die in the gutters for his wife humiliated him and beat him black and blue so that she could lie in bed with her lover. It implied that he was a loser who had been robbed of his life and of his dignity and who could do nothing. He suddenly felt a rage inside him. He was livid. He was not a loser, he would prove that to everyone and most importantly to Nandita, the witch who destroyed his life. He heard her titter and something snapped inside his head. He took out the chopper from the pillow case.

“Well, good luck, son. Don't be scared now. Don't stop. Punish them. Destroy them.” The apparition's words encouraged him. Abir took a deep breath and then charged inside.

------------

The police inspector looked at the mutilated bodies with disgust. There were blood and gore all over the room. The bed sheets were soaking in it. Dried blood stains were there on the wall, even on the ceiling fan. One of the panels of the wardrobe was splotched. There were bits and pieces of human bodies scattered all over the room.

“What happened here?” The inspector wondered aloud.

“Husband caught wife and his lover and did a number on them, sir.” The head constable replied. “He was not satisfied with only murdering them. He had to make mincemeat out of them. The bodies are impossible to identify.”

“Did you apprehend the bas**** who did this?”

“Yes sir. He was hiding in a hotel but we tracked him down. He surrendered meekly but we could not find the murder weapon.”

-----------

“Well, Abir, are you happy now?” The apparition's voice startled Abir. He was in the lockup. He still could not believe that he had murdered two people. All that he could remember was that he moved towards the bedroom and then the next thing he remembered was that he was washing his hands and feet. His clothes were bloodied so he peeked inside the bedroom and saw the dead bodies. It was enough to scare him witless. The apparition had gone silent too so he had no one to guide him. He had enough sense to change his clothes. He got rid of the clothes and the chopper and then went back to his hotel room. The police had arrested him at midnight.

“I am in the lockup and most likely going to hang for 2 murders. Why should I be happy?”

“But you are rid of that nasty woman.”

“I should not have killed her.” Abir closed his eyes.

“Well, she had it coming.”

“I don't care. I don't want to be here.”

“Soon you should be out.”

Abir was surprised at how self assured the apparition sounded.

“All that you have to do is to feign madness. Make an insanity plea. You will be taken to an insane asylum but that would be better than a jail, right?”

The idea gave Abir a glimmer of hope. Could he really pull it off? He decided to give it a try. The problem was that he did not know how an insane person was supposed to behave. Should he try to climb up a wall? Should he become desperately violent and hurt some more people? Should he start scratching his face and his body? What should he do?

“Tell them about me.” The apparition suddenly spoke. “Tell them how you followed my advice.”

When Abir was interrogated, he started to ramble about the ghost of his grandfather (he was commended for it by the apparition) and how the ghost manipulated Abir and forced him to commit the murders. The more he spoke about the ghost, the more the policemen were convinced of him being insane. His session with the psychiatrist went smoothly too. In the end, everyone was convinced that Abir was insane, that the work stress and an unhappy marriage had forced him to take shelter in his imaginary world but the sight of his wife and her lover was the trigger that pushed him off the rails. Abir was found to be suffering from paranoid schizophrenia. The trial court acquitted him on the very grounds and Abir found himself to be admitted to an insane asylum.

Ever since he had started taking medications, he had not heard the voice of the apparition. It was explained to him that there was no apparition as such. He was the one who was speaking to himself. Everything else was either a hallucination or a figment of his imagination. His treatment went on for almost a year before he was released to the care of his parents. His father Nathulal looked chastised and defeated. He had come to know of the mental tortures Nandita had heaped on his son and he was ashamed for supporting Nandita all the time and never standing up for his son.

One week after Abir reached his parental house, the apparition spoke to him.

“Well, we did it.”

Abir gave a jerk and stood up.

“What are you scared of, son?” The apparition took the shape of his grandfather.

“You are nothing. You are just a figment of my imagination.” Abir mechanically repeated the lines his psychiatrist had drilled in him.

“What?” The apparition was hurt. “Is this what I get for helping you?”

“No, you are not real. Go away. Go away.”

“Seriously? This can't be happening to me.” The apparition sounded very hurt and confused. “Every time I go to help you morons, every single time, you start denying my existence. And yet, I keep looking for a willing soul, someone who will acknowledge me, give me my due. And then, see what I do for him. Oh, this hurts. I really wanted to work along with you. You could have had it all and now you deny even my existence. You really think that demons are not real, that they are only living in your mind. Oh, how wrong you are! Demons are all around you. I could have protected you. Oh, and I thought things were going to get interesting now that she has found you. I could have helped you in getting rid of her but no, you had to go and infuriate me. Fine, Mr Abir. Handle her on your own. Goodbye and good riddance!”

The voice stopped speaking. Abir took a deep breath. He wiped the sweat off his brows with the palm of his hand. His breathing had got a bit laboured. He sat down on the bed and sighed. Then he heard Nandita's voice.

“I have finally found you.”

Abir screamed and kept on screaming.

--- the end ---