The Frivolous Tooth

This weekend she believed would bring a change. It will not be one of the those” happy couple spending time together” faking type, because she had the best news to share, the one that would win her a love-pride-happiness filled embrace, the one she missed since months. The love pouring, togetherness embrace had transformed into a possessive husband’s muscular hands holding her body for the world to infer “I own her”.But everything will soon change, she would be again living her happily married and happy family life and the little life inside her would be the reason.

Everything did change.

She opened her bleary eye swhen the cat all seven pounds of squirming flesh climbed onto her belly. Squinting into the sunlight streaming in from the open window, she discovered that she was now a weary possessor of a pounding headache, and at some point, had managed to lose both a tooth and a spouse.

Her ambiance was peaceful and so was she, quiet and tranquil, though the bruises and broken tooth hurt. Her tongue touched that space and she could feel the blood and the void. She looked the cat in its eyes,their stare was different. She stood up, placed it on the ground walking to the mirror. The cat, she saw it run away. She looked at the mirror, bleeding lips, dry red eyes, swollen face with a missing tooth stared back at her. She washed her face, picked up the cushion on the floor and put it back on the couch. Her palms cupped her face.Sigh.She looked straight on the ground. There he was lying so silent, so lifeless. Blood all over the face, half-open eyes, and a still body. That part of the floor would no one believe has white marble.

A few hours earlier, so violent and stone-hearted he was to hit her even after she conveyed him the best news boring his favorite, prettiest smile. That heart was lifeless now. The heart he had said as he proposed her” My heart belongs to you now, please accept it and be mine forever.”It was now lifeless just as the heart-shaped pillow he gave her on their first anniversary “just for you” written on it. He was so proud and happy to have her, her smile was his favorite he had said and he would do anything to make her smile, he had said. Pure forms of lies these were or truths that were buried deep under because of doubts , jealousy, and alcohol? Had he trusted her more than the world, had he trusted her she never compared their positions at work were never an issue for her, they would be celebrating now to welcome their child. Their first child. they would be discussing names now to call her or him, sweet arguments over her who he or she would look more like, who she would love more and what they would celebrate his or her first birthday and how they would decorate the room. But there he lay lifeless and missed everything.

An hour prior to that so happy she was, excited and lost in thoughts to find the best way to unfurl the most momentous news to her” better half”.So excited that she didn’t realize it was midnight and his husband had still not returned. It was not the first time he was late, but today it was okay if he arrives a little late so that she would figure the best way of conveying her the news. Shall she write and give it to him, shall she say him and run away, she could not figure out. This news will be presenting back her lost happiness, all the time they had fought, argued, all the times he had hit her, he would be sorry and she would forgive her with a promise that they would together build the best life for their child.

Knock on the door. She ran and opened it. A cold face with red eyes was staring back at her. He is drunk she guessed. He entered the room without a word. Closing the door she ran to him.”I wish I could capture this moment” in her mind she said. Failing to find words, she holds his hands and touched her belly with them, then hugged him. He didn’t hug back.That hurt.

Thrash....she was pushed back. Her senses failed to realize what happened,she stood up and a slap again. She fell, her face hit to the edge of the glass table. Her mouth was bleeding, a loosened tooth. Before she could get up she was pulled by her hair “You whore, whose is it?” .Blank. Surrounding darkness.”It?? This is our chi...” slapped again. The tooth broke.

Knock on the door.

“Is there any problem sir”

“No. None of your business, Get out of here”

Door slammed.

The boy would have returned, of course, it was none of his business to interfere, investigate or get into a fight of strangers, who he has not seen before or would by any chance meet in future. He would have asked only because of the chaos the disturbance caused to other guests. The other guests who had absolutely no idea about the source of the sound, her pain physical and psychological.The situation she was facing and the innocent child inside her with the size of perhaps a lizard, with a small heart beating.

 The last few hours she has been talking to her, yes she wanted her child to be a girl, who she would give all the happiness of the world. Would she judge her mommy? The woman whose womb she chose to grow till she receives the light of the outer world had lied her. Would she call her a liar? The person whom she trusted would give her a safe life was already showing her the face of the pain. Will she ever be able to forgive her daddy who doubts her mother’s character, who is questioning his own child’s fatherhood. She felt sorry for giving her all the pseudo hopes, which were shattered within minutes, would she trust to live inside her for nine more months? She wanted to hold her close to her heart to console her, seek her forgiveness and promise her not to hurt again, to provide her with the healthiest living the nine months, she resides inside her.

He rushed back. Moving to and fro like a mad, drunk animal he shouted:” I will kill you... I will kill you both,I will end this, you bitch I will kill you and that misfortune inside you, yes that is it, I will kill you.”He threw the cushion and lifting the chair to hit her. His drunk unconscious mind didn’t cooperate him and as he lifted it again she grabbed the vase near her and bang. She moved away. The vase fell to the ground and so did he. 

“Don’t be a scared baby. He can’t hurt you, anymore.Anyone.i will not let anyone hurt you” she said caressing her belly.

Her eyes were dry. She was not in pain anymore. She watched at her husband’s lifeless body. The vase with a broken base.”Was I always this strong” she asked herself. This was not the first time he hit her. Was she responsible for this? Stopping him, was she always capable of it? Lots of unanswered questions. she didn’t know when she falls asleep.

.......

A little more time. The door might knock again. Not getting a response they might use the extra hotel key and break into the room. And everyone who felt relaxed for the ceased noise would be shocked to see what they would see. A murderer I will be referred” A woman who killed her husband”, hateful eyes, abusive words and much more of it. Would anyone understand? The boy who came last night, will he that the silently lying lifeless man who shouted at him last night deserved being in this state? The cat, which climbed onto her belly despite the blood in her hands.Her child, who was within her all the time, and might have moved a little a close to her uterine walls because she was frightened by her father’s actions and wanted her mommy beside her.May be May not be. She didn’t want an answer. A little more of this peaceful rest for her, for her baby she wanted. Lying down on the couch she closed her eyes and a teardrop managed to escape.

After seven years behind the bars, trials, sessions she had returned back home with her little 6-year-old angel. 

The little girl’s laugh made all her misfortunes vanish. Her soft touch would make all her pain vanish away. Her cute, small, stammering words would make her forget the whole world. She has named her Khusi. Happiness is meant and that’s what she experienced the first time she held her in her arms. The first time she held her in her arms, she knew what she was for her, her world, who she would never trade for anything. The day she called her the first time she could not hold her tears,she was laughing and crying at the same time. The way she holds her, running into her embrace makes her feel complete. Her Khushi and she was her mommy.

A little mirror in her hand from her barbie doll collection. Holding it in her tiny hands she came running towards her. Keeping that little mirror in front of her face She said” mommy, you look so much like me. See even you have a broken tooth like me.” She showed her whole set of twenty-three teeth and chuckled. She smiled and hugged her” Yes my baby, we look the same”.

She stood up and looked in the mirror. The missing tooth, Yes there was a void but now neither did it hurt nor was its absence felt