What I Yearned

IGNIS ENTRY

1: A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval. - Mark Twain

I couldn’t be

Not because I was disgusted

Not because I was introverted

Not because I was not in my right mind

But because I was afraid to show myself

Afraid to be myself

Live like myself

Afraid to fight for myself

Afraid to dishearten those people

I wasn’t living

For I was always grieving

For the lost cause like myself

I was just dreaming

To be someone, not me

For showing those people

Yet the mask shattered

And everyone cackled

For I had become a joke

As the nightmare became real

I hid my face

Ashamed of myself

For their joke portrayed my reality

But they soon forgot me

Left me, dropped me

For I met someone who accepted

My flaws for flaws

My pains for pains

And forgave me for I hadn’t helped him

When he uncovered himself

He thought me

Life can’t be predicted

It is better to uncover oneself

Rather than losing oneself

For the soul can’t be freed

Without one’s mind being free

And a man can’t be in comfort

If he can’t unlock his brain

I have long left behind

That life of mine

For I looked around for comfort

But never searched in the mind

Now I am myself

I do not regret

I have found my freedom

That I yearned from the rest.