Another Year Gone!

2019 was the 62nd January that I have seen in my life and 2020 would become the 63rd. I have somehow not been able to figure out the mystique and aura surrounding 1st January. But this story is not about why a new year gets us all excited. That will be for another story, perhaps.

2018 for me ended bitterly. At the end of that year, I was a sadder and wiser man than ever before. Wiser? Well, I do not know, but definitely sadder. I was then past 61 years of age. I was jobless, moneyless and of course, clueless. It was really a marvel that I could navigate the year without falling prey to depression or even suicidal thoughts! But the year was ending and I was on the threshold of entering 2019. I did not have much to cheer or even look forward to.

The outlook for the year 2019 looked bleak and full of dark forebodings for me. I was left with only one hope; that I would somehow get the strength from divine forces to keep me sane. My relatives and friends were, as usual, more optimistic about their lives and mine and hundreds of them wished me a very happy and prosperous 2019. 

Well, the fact that I am writing this story means that my guardian angels have indeed taken care of me. Is it not? 

The year itself started sedately, just like the other 61 odd years and months before it. I was doing bit jobs for survival and the money that came in was just about enough to keep me afloat. It also helped me in holding on to my optimism about life; that everything was not over even when it looked so. 

Some stupid investments I had made in mutual funds and insurance policies suddenly started paying me back, as if these companies were ordered by my angels to pay me! My spirits and outlook improved considerably. I wondered how the lack of money became so important in shaping my life; and how the sudden inflow of cash could lift me up! Believe me, I had tried to force myself to continue working productively ( read, for money) but somehow I felt my angels were not helping me at all. It was as if they did not want me to work! So, most of my time was spent at home, brooding over my bleak future.

As the cash came in, the year somehow seemed a changed one to me. If the first half of 2019 was despairing, the second half was encouraging. My ability to express myself through stories suddenly came alive. For years I had been writing and storing my stuff on the cloud (G Drive), but the last two years had been most unproductive, just like my financial life. Now, all of a sudden, my literary life ( is that the right phrase?) changed. I began writing and exploring avenues to share my stories with the world at large. Suddenly, I felt the urgent need to share, a feeling I never had before.

This was the phase that led me to Kindle Direct Publishing. They were eager to accept my stories and they would help me publish them, e-books or paperbacks, whatever I wished.

In 2019, I have published a couple of e-books and one novel on Amazon. This was only the beginning. I realized that stories were sprouting inside me like the flowers in spring. I began writing, about me, my life experiences, about crime, mystery and anything else that would spring out from inside me. Story Mirror happened to me, I believe, just when my urge to share was getting out of control. I am truly amazed by how much I write here, both volume and contents. More than sharing with you readers, it looks like I am discovering myself through my pen ( sorry, I have forgotten the pen and its uses. I type now). My keyboard speaks and my fingers type.

Even as this was happening, my literary diarrhoea as I would like to call it, other windows were opening up. These allowed me to peep into new worlds that I had never been aware of before. New awareness, avenues, and opportunities.

That is how 2019 will end for me. It started on a depressing note with me hanging on to hope; and ending with a lot of satisfaction, gratitude, and life now recharged with the goodness of everything around me.