Satvik Gupta

Children Stories Fantasy Others

5.0  

Satvik Gupta

Children Stories Fantasy Others

The Martian

The Martian

10 mins
557



23 March 2043,   Mon


I have been told that writing a catalogue of my experiences henceforth will help me deal with the situation I find myself in. I feel the necessity to document that I have been told to do this activity and it is not a voluntary response. Dr. Paige is convinced that it will help me understand and overcome my current state of ‘emotion’ and analyze my ‘feelings’ in a better way. I have negotiated for the activity to be a weekly thing and not a daily one as was suggested by her.


Well, I think my current ‘emotion’ is helplessness as I feel the new organic butter feels nothing like what real butter tastes like. For years, I craved for fresh, non-preservative soaked, creamy, with just a tinge of yellow, butter. Now that I am back – the new vegan wave has made it impossible to find a brick of real butter. I can live without my morning coffee (I don’t consider soya milk coffee, ‘real coffee’ for clarification) and can do with pizza without any cheese, but I need butter with my morning toast. I cannot switch to the heath-o bar that everyone seems to be having at the moment. I was searching for how much a cow may cost yesterday night, and it might just be feasible, but I cannot imagine myself milking it. Well, I think that’s some good thoughts put down today.


In the next episode, you will hear from me on my experiment with cereal with water and natural made milk extracts. Stay Tuned.


30 March, 2043,  Mon


Dr. Paige was less than impressed by my account of last week’s experiences. She said she lied to me deliberately about not reading the account, to see how seriously I take the activity. I feel cheated.  The rest was usual: she asked me the number of anxiety attacks I had last week, the number of hours I was sleeping per day, and if my calorie intake increased. For a psychiatrist, she seems very impersonal. I don’t mind it as I am not the best person to convey emotions anyway. But I was wondering if this was the best thing for the other ‘group A-308’ members. This does not seem like a top notch psychiatry center. I am wondering if some funding has been cut considering the mission was not a complete success. I am writing all this as I am quite confident that Dr. Paige will not read this account next week. Time shall tell, however.


She did ask me to use the herbal butter by ‘V-understand’ as she thought that it came closest to what she remembered of the taste of butter. I tried today. I was disappointed.


06 April, 2043,   Mon


I was correct! She did not ask to read what I had written last week. The score ties at one-one as of now. Considering the general quality of the healthcare, I scarcely thought she would indulge in the accounts of her patients for two weeks straight. She was a bit more personal today: she asked me to find a ‘companion’. I said I had no-one, but I could re-connect with my college friends, Guy and Jack. I have not decided if I will call them yet. She said I should connect with someone in the same group as we should be experiencing the same situation. I did not like anyone in my group. Except Julie maybe. She never initiated ‘small talk’ and I like that quality in someone. I am planning to call her tomorrow to ask her for dinner. She ended with how it will be easier to find a companion for me now as ‘my people’ have their own communities. I didn’t quite understand then, but nodded and agreed.


I realize now that she meant ‘companion’ in a love sort of angle and now that I mentioned my friends, she thinks I am gay. I don’t know why, but that makes me uncomfortable.



14 April, 2043    Tue


I am one day late. I am supposed to write these religiously on Mondays. I do not see a point of writing these anymore considering they will not be audited. But it does not take much time anyway. My dinner with Julie went well. However, the event seemed too much like a ‘date’. For there to be no misunderstanding, I still have not called her back for another meeting. I will, maybe in a week, ask her casually for lunch. For I don’t think lunch can be miscued for a date? Well, I don’t know if things have changed in the last 8 years however.


I told Dr. Paige about my meeting with Julie. I also told her the fact that I was planning on bringing her home (although it had no truth to it), to clarify the fact that I was straight. She told me that there may be a possibility of ‘performance failure’ due to the medications. In hindsight, I feel that I should not have brought it up now.


 21 April, 2043,   Tue,


It was my birthday yesterday. Three people wished me in total. I turned thirty-five. I left for Mars when I was 27. 7 years, I had my birthday on Mars and they were all better than yesterday. I had a record four panic attacks. I had three before I met Dr. Paige. She gave me some new medication. Yesterday, was a bit more personal. She asked me about why I ever took up the Mars mission. I told her that it was a great opportunity for being part of something unique. I don’t think she bought it. I have not told her about the death of my girlfriend and how it triggered my decision to leave.


Before leaving, she wished me a happy birthday and gifted me a brick of real butter. I came back home and realized I am starting to like Dr. Paige. That is when I had the fourth attack.


27 April, 2043,  Mon


Dr. Paige told me that next week will be my last session with her and that I would need to contact NASA directly if I needed the additional therapy. She recommended I extend, as my panic attacks have continued. I nodded along, but I am not sure if I will.


I have nothing else to say really. I miss the view of the stars from Mars. I think I may have to go to the countryside to have a look at the stars. I plan on going the day after. I will ask Julie at lunch tomorrow if she wants to come along.


4 May 2043    Mon


I told Dr. Paige that I will not be asking for continued therapy. It’s not like I mind going to the weekly sessions but in my own eyes I don’t seem like a person who would continue therapy voluntarily. Funny how we see ourselves from a 3rd person perspective to judge on how we do things. I told her the trip with Julie to the countryside was refreshing. My anxiety attacks have reduced. Countryside seemed more like Mars. Quiet. I also told her that there was no ‘performance failure’ with Julie over the last week. We laughed.


She wrote her final report and gave me prescription for more meds. I did not know if the final meeting called out for a goodbye hug. I went for it and she gave me a hand to shake. We had an awkwardly close handshake. I thanked her and left the place.


 5 May, 2043, Tue


Oh, I completely forgot to mention how Dr. Paige told me nobody liked organic butter if anyone was asked personally. But with all the social media awareness, nobody seems to speak about it. I think I may write a blog about the hypocrisy of this whole vegan wave. I mean they still eat bread! Wait. Is fungi something that is considered alive?


Anyhow, what I am saying is I have seen a lot of people swat mosquitos and that also seems controversial. I messaged my thoughts to Dr. Paige’s mobile phone. She told me nobody has read blogs from 2020 and I should already know that. We had a good conversation afterwards.


9 May, 2043   Sat


Julie committed suicide. I have applied to NASA for extended therapy.


12 May, 2043  Tue


NASA rejected my request as I sent the application after the deadline. I am going to their office tomorrow to give them a piece of my mind.


15 May, 2043   Fri


Things got a little heated. I may have punched someone I should not have. There are talks of discontinuing my allowance. I have sent an apology note.


18 May, 2043      Mon


I have been asked to vacate the house they have provided by the month-end. I don’t know what to do. The Grocery store jobs have been taken over by robots and no easy job seems to be on the horizon. I don’t know what to do.


05 June, 2043       Thu

Dr. Paige saw me waiting in line for food for the homeless. She took me in. I have been treading carefully as I don’t know how long or how much can I consider the comforts that she has offered. The panic attacks are few and far between since the trip to the countryside. She laughed at a couple of my jokes today, so that seems good. I made her dinner when she came home. She seemed to like it.


 07 June, 2043     Thu

We kissed today. It was warm. A little wet. It was nice.

We are planning on going to the countryside over the weekend. I think I’ll look for a job next week.


14 June, 2043    Thu


It was cloudy over the weekend. We cuddled by the fire. I could not…ummmm….perform over the weekend. We cuddled and talked. She is nice and made me feel less embarrassed.


I got rejected in 3 different interviews in the meanwhile. The panic attacks are back. I’ve successfully hidden them from Dr. Paige.


 22 June, 2043     Fri


Dr. Paige slapped me yesterday and asked me to get out. I applied for NASA’s next mission to Mars. They apparently don’t know when to stop. They welcomed me back. I was the only one with experience. I will be the group leader. This time it will be for eight years. They’ve given me a place to live again until departure. We leave in September.


21 July, 2043    Tue


I’ve been sending apology notes to Dr. Paige for a month – she responded yesterday. We are meeting for Lunch tomorrow. She wanted to have dinner, but I was adamant on Lunch. She will extend her lunch break to come and see me.


23 July, 2043      Tue


I think we are friends. I think that’s you can call us. We both were not too hungry, so we had coffee. I can’t get used to Soya milk coffee. I asked her to join my anti-vegan movement. We laughed.


15 August, 2043   Wed


I depart in two weeks. They say the journey is going to be slower this time as they plan on burning less fuel. Less fuel? Since when did NASA care about that! Anyhow, training starts tomorrow. They are going to try new fluids which will keep us sleeping 35 hours at a stretch and then awake for 10 hours. They think it’s better this way. It’s funny how there seems to be no government control over what they do here.


03 September, 2043   Thu



I met Dr. Paige today. I depart day after tomorrow. We talked about my anxiety attacks. She asked me more medical questions today than usual. I joked that I will come back to her when I’m back in eight years. She did not seem to find it funny. She gifted me two bricks of real butter. I am not sure if I can take them onto the shuttle but I will make a request.


 05 September, 2043   Sat


 I depart in six hours. They will put us under in two. The butter was organic wrapped in real butter covers. I did not know she did practical jokes. I am not sure if that changes anything. I looked in the mirror today and I think my skin was a red-ish shade. I am not sure that changes anything either.





Rate this content
Log in

More english story from Satvik Gupta