Rays Of Reprimand

Sun shyly peeps inside, from the tiny split between the curtains, sheepishly claiming the center stage, as it gently illuminates and showers life. Quietly searching for an adventure, aching for a quest which suddenly comes to a halt when it nudges the brown-tinted lines engraved on the flesh of Rajiv. He frantically rushes under his bed, trying to push away those rays, as far as he could, each light gradually tormenting him, shaking his being from within but rays defy to let go of their conquest.

To defeat them, he instantly gets up, and rushes towards the windows, closing them as fast as he can, while each ray agonizes him, each movement throbbing his body from within, a current cascading through his veins, desperately trying to shield himself from those rays. His body relaxes as the light slowly vanishes into the void but before his heart could completely settle down, he hears a squeal and he disintegrates onto the floor, tears gushing out, prayers under his breath, body immobile, eyes reflecting nothingness and all he could feel now, are those marks whose squeals echoing from different parts of his body, telling him that he’s not man enough to be anything. All he is worth now is dust.

Each tear, yelling silently, praying for serenity but this tiny escape gets interrupted, with a thud, that freezes everything, even the tears seem motionless, his eyes open in shock, tears blurring his vision, heart wishing for a miracle but the brain screaming it’s over, and all he can hear are shouts of his own inadequacy, as swarm of women surrounds him, tearing each piece of clothing bit by bit, telling him he deserves it, this is justice. Each shred, each tear, each crack, and each jeer, eventually make him lose his vanity. Every squeal and touch, every abuse and disgust reflected from their wretched eyes, make him a question and loathe his own existence, somewhere accepting each sneer as it brings forth societal expectations. It reminds him of his shortcomings, makes him realize he’s an object meant only for reaping, with no freedom in sight.

Bit by bit each sign of consciousness evades and logic surrenders to the insults that shoots him to shreds with each ray and each day, his soul eventually accepts, steadily succumbing in front of those glares yet imagining a day of freedom from those self-inflicted cages, wishing that the sun doesn’t rise and he gets spared just for one day but the sun, this time shone even brighter, exposing the tiniest tear on his fragile body, which can no longer withstand his own weight, he glares down at his own reflection, in those shreds of his own personality, as it slowly morphs into a girl. She has pearly eyes concealed with tears, a smile that’s bloody red, hair all mangled, on a body delicate enough to break under its own weight, even the faces of those women strangling her, suddenly imitate his own, reflecting the devil itself, magnified on his body. He begs for forgiveness from that gleam, he bows forward for his own cowardice for kneeling that day in front of his lust, as he implodes on the same floor, hoping that the air will deceive him just like he deceived his honor that day for few minutes of ecstasy, that one day he will complete his punishment for his gender doing the same, every day, when he wakes up from this nightmare, repeating his horror on himself every night, making him wish that maybe one day, he will find salvation in those dark nights, when everyone sleeps and he cries the tears of penitence.