Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

It's me again with my weird stories and weird me. This was a long time ago but I will tell you because I can't sleep and it is making me sad and angry at the same time.

"I woke up in the middle of the night with a weird dream about somebody putting their hands in my panties. When I opened my eyes, my head was still fuzzy but I felt somebody’s hand slipping out of my underwear. But, before I could figure out my surroundings more clearly, I heard a voice asking “Do you want to go pee?”. I replied, “Yes” with a sleepy voice. When the fresh air of the night hit my face, after I came out of the room, I realized it was my aunty who asked me the question and I was sleeping beside her. I have always liked my aunt very much. I was 5-6 years old back then. But I was still confused about how I was in her bedroom because I mostly sleep beside my mother or grandmother. I got scared since my mother would be angry if she came to know I was sleeping in my aunt's room while her husband was there."

Today my younger Aunt visited us. She got married a few years ago and it has been 12 years since we left that village and are living in Delhi. Like before, today as well, my aunty and I decided that we would sleep together in my room. Since she had visited us after so many years, we couldn’t sleep but kept talking about the village getting nostalgic. There were so many memories; sleeping on the terrace, making jokes and laughing till late at night even after getting scolded. And then we started talking about the marriage of my uncle."On the day of his marriage, uncle got really mad with the older aunt's husband and wanted him to leave." I asked my aunty why? I had this question since then but nobody used to answer me properly. Then my aunt told me, he touched a cousin or sister of ours inappropriately and my uncle got to know about it and he was angry the same. I suddenly remembered my dream. I had almost forgotten about that incident thinking it was just a dream. I told my aunt this and she was shocked to hear. After some time, she asked me not to tell my father because it can create a huge family issue at home. She told me that it is not just me but all the girls in my home, all my cousin sisters do not like being around him or going near him because they have all experienced this in some form or the other.

I really felt angry and wanted to tell my parents but I felt pity for my older aunt and her children and I did not want to hurt them in any way. So, l kept my mouth shut.