Benitton's Speech

"So she's going to express herself after a year of silence?" asked one of the students.

"Perhaps going to make a fool of herself. "said another.

"It's a surprise that Benitton has finally decided to open up and that too in the Farewell Program!" said one of those whom this girl called Benitton, despised a lot.

"Oh! Would you stop? The whole lot of you? She has faced a lot of torture because of her inquisitive nature. That is what forced her to keep quiet. "said her only friend Marcy.

"So teachers and students. Lets have a round of applause for Anneliese Benitton. Lets encourage her while she makes her speech. "it was the host of the Farewell Celebration in the 'Mark's Higher Secondary School' , who had added the last sentence to encourage the hesitating, trembling white figure. Anneliese did look shaken, not because of stage fear but because she had a lot to say that afternoon. Her constitution changed gradually, giving way to a patient face whose tone had seriousness mingled with sarcasm. She started. . . . .

"I am sad to think I live in a century in which brilliance is measured by marks. The other day, when I had come up with "Oh, not SO bad"marks, one of my mentors had arrived at the conclusion that I had stopped studying altogether. Not her fault in the least, as she had high expectations from me. I would like to inform her humbly, that I do not care or bother to fulfill your expectations, since you were least bothered to fulfill mine. Many teachers present around me, or should I say, all of them, teach for money, for salary, for posts. So are my fellow students, at all levels and ages. . . . study for degrees and marks but no knowledge.

The teachers did so too, in their childhood. But I die for 'knowledge'. I am hungry for 'knowledge', not marks. A thirst which you could not quench.

My mistakes are simply committed because I am always vary and afraid, I might score less and "shatter all your hopes. "But at least now, I do not care about your hopes. A teacher asked me last week while handing me over my question paper, "Did you get anything 'common'?". But why?Where is our intellect?Why do we fear to face uncommon, unknown questions? It is because we have no knowledge in reality. They ask me today, why do I consider myself to be the best?Because I do have the intellect to realize that we have no time. We get easily satisfied, with whatever we are taught because we have not yet started questioning. We have been sent on earth for some noble cause, but yet, we, the most brilliant species of all, have not been able to understand nature's way. How and why the universe works?Why does time go forward?It leaves me with so much worry that I already feel so old, though I am just a teenager.

Many of my teachers here are already middle-aged. They would die soon. Our voyage on earth will end soon. Yet we are ready with no answer, not a single word. We have yet been unsuccessful in linking or finding the connection between ourselves and nature. Yet we rejoice, party, make merry. What for? We compete. Why?Why do we have to prove that we are better than the others?Are we not deviating largely from finding the answers?

There are teachers who compare me to the fellow, who scored a 97% previous year,

proving that our school builds merit. Teachers wish to know why I am not improving myself?But I am busy finding answers and these mere competitions would not shake me from my chosen path. I am starting to realize that I am different and changing ones views ,

trying a different path yields a new result. There is no mistake, just another path which seems to our limited knowledge, untraversable.

We prohibit students to explore, they are so afraid to fail. I am afraid the numbers 65% and 85% measure our intellect! But how can earthly numbers measure such a thing as knowledge?What do we even get by telling our children that they are 86% and one of their friends are 95%? Do we try to tell them their limitations?Do we try to tell them they are wrong in some places?Do we know enough to say they are wrong?Are we able to reason out why they are wrong?Nah, do we have such a lot of time?

Why am I supposed to do better than her? Why is there a need to compete about known facts?To compete about memory?If only we had devoted some time to find the answers!

Death would not have been so uncertain, so fearful, so much unknown for us. We have such a short time left, yet we do not try to slow down time. I might sound spiritual, but that does not prove me wrong. We waste our time competing, what satisfaction do we get if we are proved to be better than a person?We still do not have the answers we were sent to look for! Earth is full of hints, well-equipped, full of keys to the solution, but we choose to ignore them, we choose to fail. We do not know what's after death, we choose not to think about them, we consider them as nightmares - as we are never taught to overcome our fears.

I hope I am able to give you a part of my worries since you were so longingly seeking it.

Marks seem meager to me, life does not end with good results since we still do not have the answers! I do not expect to find supporters, as is always the case with people like me. I do not expect you to find answers, believe me or obey me. But I would try my best to solve mysteries that I am sent to solve before the time remaining for me is a minute, some seconds or 00 seconds" she finished.

And the students could only stare at her in awe. As for the teachers, the principal along with many others were glaring at her with bloodshot countenance, making it evident that she had at last invited her doom and misery. . . that too on her last day at school!