My Financial Career

When I go into a bank I get rattled. The clerks rattle me., the wickets rattle me., the sight of the money rattles me., everything rattles me.

The movement I cross the threshold of a bank and attempt to transact business there, I become an irresponsible idiot. I knew this beforehand, but my salary had been raised to fifty dollars a month and I felt that the bank was the only place for it.

So I shambled in and looked timidly round at the clerks. I had an idea that a person about to open an account must consult the manager. I went up to a wicket marked 'Accountant' . The very sight of him rattled me. My voice was sepulchral. "Can I see the manager?" I said, and added solemnly, "alone". I don't know why I said 'alone'. "Certainly", said the accountant, and fetched him. The manager was a grave, calm man. I held my fifty-six dollars clutched in a crumpled ball in my pocket.

" Are you the manager?" I said. God knows I didn't doubt it.

"Yes", he said.

" Can I see you", I asked, " alone?" I didn't want to say 'alone' again, but without in my question seemed self-evident.       The manager looked at me in some alarm. He felt that I had an awful secret to reveal. "Come in here", he said and led the way to a private room. He turned the key in the lock. "We are safe from interruption here", he said ., "sit down".

 He had gathered from my mysterious manner that I was a detective. I knew what he was thinking, and it made me worse. "No, from Pinkerton's, " I said, seeming to imply that I came from a rival agency.

"To tell the truth", I went on, as if I had been promoted to lie about it, "I am not a detective at all. I have come to open an account. I intend to keep all my money in this bank." The manager looked relieved but still serious., he concluded now that I was a son of Baron Rothschild or a young Gould. "A large account, I suppose", he said. "Fairly large ", I whispered. "I propose to deposit fifty-six dollars now and fifty dollars a month regularly".

The manager got up and opened the door. He called the accountant. "Mr. Montgomery", he said unkindly loud, "this gentleman is opening an account, he will deposit fifty-six dollars.

Good morning".

I rose.

A big iron door stood open at the side of the room. "Good morning ", I said and stepped into the safe. "Come out", said the manager coldly, and showed me the other way.