Love Reincarnated

He could not watch her suffering the way she did.

Julia lay on the hospital bed, wreathing and straining against her bindings, while the doctors and nurses bustled around her trying their best to save her. For them, she was just another life, but for Frank, she was his whole life. He silently prayed that his wife would make it out of this alive and well.

He remembered how desperately she had wanted a child and he went to great lengths to give her one—a beautiful girl born barely twenty-four hours earlier. He closed his eyes and pressed his hand to his chest where he assumed his heart was.

Soon, a nurse approached Frank and requested him to wait outside the room, with the assurance that his wife would be all right very soon. He looked into the nurse’s eyes and wondered what the expression on her face was – it was ambiguous to him. Would his wife really come out okay? He hoped she would be.

He walked outside with small, hesitant steps and saw the entire family – both his and Julia’s – either standing or seated. They met his gaze with their own sympathetic ones. He could see tears glistening in their eyes. They all felt the way he did. Only, he knew that wasn’t true: he was sure he felt worse. No one among them knew the full extent of his feelings now. He gave them all a glance of acknowledgement before sitting down at one of the two empty chairs with his head in his hands.

How long he lay like that, going through all of his times with his lovely wife, he didn’t know.

An unusual gurgling sound nearby startled him. He looked up to see his father-in-law holding a baby in his arms. His baby. The baby his wife delivered and was now suffering the consequences for. The baby they had tried forever to have – a lifetime that was over as soon as it began.

Frank watched the boisterous young baby his wife had named Maria Theresa, after her late grandmother. The little thing looked so bright and happy, her arms waving about – almost knocking her grandfather’s glasses – that he could not keep being depressed anymore. He had to smile at the charming smile his baby was giving him.

His father-in-law bent slightly, so the baby was at his height. “Do you want to hold her?” he asked.

Frank stood up slowly and nodded. He reached out to gingerly pick up the little thing from the outstretched arms of Julia’s father and held her. The baby was more beautiful than anything he ever saw – with the possible exception of his wife. Her eyes and hair, he noticed, were coloured just like Julia’s. This made his chest ache. How he wished his wife would get better soon, so the three of them could go back to their lives in peace.

A smile crept up to his features as he gazed at his happy little daughter, and he knew at once that all would be well – that his wife would come out fine and the three would live happily ever after. Just like in the fairy tales…

It was at this point that the door of the surgery room opened, with practised caution, and the doctor attending to Frank’s wife stepped out.

Frank looked up at him. “What is it, doctor?” He shifted the baby from one arm to another. “Is it over? Is it going to be okay?”

The doctor was very experienced in what was coming next and he had done this a hundred times. But now, as he saw the young man and his baby, he hesitated for the first time in his career as a surgeon.

“Er – I think you should hand the baby to her grandfather and sit down for a minute,” he began.

He did as told as sat down on the chair he had been occupying earlier. The doctor laid a hand on his shoulder gently.

“I’m sorry,” he said, “we tried everything, but she lost her battle even before she had a chance to fight back.”

At first, Frank did not react. The news took some news to trickle down into his brain cells.

And when the full effect of it struck him, he could feel his entire world begin to shatter around him. He could not feel anything for a long time – he was numb. Why? Why his wife – why now? Why, after they tried so hard to have a family together?

Little Maria gurgled again and he looked up at her. The happy little baby was waving her arms around, as though nothing was wrong. It was ironical how something so joyous could produce some sadness at the same time. Those clear blue eyes and that dark chocolate-brown hair that reminded him of his Julia.

What the doctor was saying, he paid no heed to. As he gazed into his daughter’s eyes, he knew exactly what he needed to do.